1. I RECENTLY had a fight
with a large bramble/
honeysuckle bush. It’s
difficult to say who won.
While there is certainly a
lot less bush there now, I
reckon my arms came off
worst – I look like a
perpetual self-harmer.
This act of violence I
perpetrated on my garden
foliage was a display of
extreme hypocrisy on my
part, as that section of the
garden had been out of
bounds to my chop-happy
partner for several years, at
my insistence that we
shouldn’t “savage the
garden and destroy its
natural beauty”.
I hadn’t realised how
carried away it’s possible to
get when faced with a
truculent plant, plenty of
time and some seriously
sharp cutting implements.
What started off as a
simple pruning session
quickly became a battle, due
mainly to the fact that as I
burrowed deeper into that
mass of green and brown, I
realised that most of the
underneath of our bush was,
in fact, dead.
Each year it was
encroaching a little bit more
on our garden, like a
decidedly slow version of
The Day of the Triffids,
while concealing beneath a
world of dead wood – hence
my frenzied attack, which I
seemed to have no control
over and which only waned
when I began to run out of
the strength needed to fight
the vines.
Falling back in a
scratched, exhausted mess
(onto an extremely spiky,
painful pile of “cuttings”),
the guilt started to creep in
as the horror of what I’d
done struck me.
Where once had stood
greenery was now a gaping
hole, glaring accusingly.
Where once were beautiful
blossoms and verdancy,
under which our chickens
could shelter, and in which
the bees could buzz, now
was barren and bereft.
I’d even killed the
hydrangea. I love
hydrangeas.
Of course there’s not a lot I
can do about it now. The
damage is done, and it’s
doubtful the poor
honeysuckle and blackberry
bush (the cuter side of the
bramble) will ever recover.
The same applies to my
sense of guilt, reiterated
each time I walk out into the
garden.
My partner, however, is
more than happy with my
bout of hypocritical
violence, which he intends
to “use” (ie bring up
repeatedly) for at least six
months”.
What have I done?
14 Daily Echo, THURSDAY APRIL 30, 2009
NEWS ON THIS DAY
311: Christians were legally
recognised in the Roman Empire.
1789: George Washington was
inaugurated as the first president of
the United States of America.
1803: The USA bought Louisiana
and New Orleans from France.
1900: Engine driver Casey Jones
died at the throttle of the
Cannonball Express at Illinois
Central, slowing down the train to
save passengers' lives.
1906: London bus routes were
numbered.
1944: The first of 500,000
prefabricated homes (prefabs) went
on show in London.
1945: Adolf Hitler shot himself dead
in his underground bunker beneath
the Chancellery in Berlin. Eva
Braun, whom he had married the
previous day, died beside him by
taking a cyanide pill.
1975: The Vietnam War ended when
the South Vietnam Government
surrendered to North Vietnam.
Fighting had continued despite the
signing of peace treaties in 1973.
1980: Armed terrorists seized the
Iranian Embassy in London and
threatened to blow it up if their
demands were not met.
ON THIS DAY LAST YEAR
Prince William flew secretly to
Afghanistan to meet frontline troops
earlier in the week, Clarence House
confirmed.
BIRTHDAYS
Willie Nelson, country singer, 76;
Burt Young, actor, 69; Bobby Vee,
singer, 66; Jill Clayburgh, actress,
65; King Carl Gustav of Sweden,
63; Leslie Grantham, actor, 62;
Jane Campion, film director, 55;
Kirsten Dunst, actress, 27.
Answer in tomorrow’s Echo
Yesterday’s answer: A statue of
King Louis XIV being positioned
after two years of restoration at
Versailles castle, Paris
Where in the world?
bournemouthecho.co.uk/news/features/columnists
WITH the news of
more and more pets
being dumped making
the front pages, it
breaks my heart to
hear of the numbers of
animals being
abandoned by people
“unable” to look after
their animals any
more (the numbers of
calls to the RSPCA
from people wanting to
give up their pets is up
by 52 per cent).
While I’m sure some
families have fallen on
such unexpectedly
hard times that they
can no longer afford
the care of their
creatures – food and
health maintenance
do, as anyone with any
sense knows, really
add up – I have to
wonder how many
people in this
situation, who rely on
charities to take over
the care of the animal
(I’m not even
considering the evil
scum that dump
domestic animals on
roadsides/in streams
etc), actually went to a
sanctuary to get their
animal to begin with.
Animals, in my
opinion, are not
products and should
not be bought and
sold.
Across the country
(and indeed the world),
there are sanctuaries
and rescue homes
literally full of
animals requiring
loving homes, yet
people still continue to
“breed” from their
animals, and people
still continue to buy
from these breeders.
Were we in a
situation where the
domestic animal
population was in a
massive decline, then
perhaps (and this isn’t
an argument I agree
with) there would be a
reason to encourage
the breeding of more.
However, as it stands,
every dog purchased
from a breeder or pet
shop leaves another
languishing in the
rescue home for longer
(and the homes that
are full have to turn
away animals).
The fact is we have
on over-population
problem with all pets,
and rescue homes full
of every single type, so
there really is no need
for anyone to allow
their animals to fall
pregnant, and then sell
the offspring; and no
need for anyone to
obtain a new pet from
anywhere other than a
rescue centre.
This isn’t a popular
argument – especially
with those making
money from the
breeding of pets.
But it’s an argument
that needs more airing
than it gets.
In these difficult
times, with people
giving less to charity
than before, it’s the
perfect opportunity to
concentrate on the
rehoming of unwanted
animals and the
spaying and neutering
of those we have.
It was shear
entertainment
PRUNED: Honeysuckle
My pet subject...
UNWANTED: Little Verde the lamb is just one of
many animals currently at Margaret Green Animal
Rescue looking for a new home