Today we are going to take a look at the other extremely important factor in writing a well-thought out essay. It is needed for every single detail that you write. It is the commentary.
4. Commentary
Is an explanation.
● Explain to your reader how the
details relate to the thesis
statement.
● It does not contain facts.
● Instead, it discusses what your
details have to do with the topic.
6. Writing
1. You are going to need at least
two sentences for every detail
sentence.
2. A good guideline is that you
commentary should be twice as
long as your details.
3. Without commentary, your
paper is just facts.
7. We want to know
how YOU think
these facts prove
your point and what
YOU think they
mean.
20. Commentary
Is the treasure that makes your
paper shine
● It should always strengthen and
extend the details.
● This is your chance to show us
what you’ve got.
● It is where you can impress us
with your analysis and
interpretation skills.
22. “What and Why”
1. If you are struggling to write
commentary, try using the
“what and why” method.
2. First, tell the reader WHAT
your detail is talking about by
defining or explaining
3. Next, let your reader know
WHY this same details is
relevant to your thesis
statement.
25. Commentary Sentence Starters Tips
Obviously, you cannot start every sentence the same way because that would be
redundant.
It is, however, helpful to think these phrases in order to guide your commentary in
the right direction.
29. Commentary
Opinion Example
● Topic: education
● Detail: According to the 2013
National Assessment of
Education Progress Reading
test, 80% of students score
below grade level in reading.
30. Opinion Example
Your commentary should answer the following
questions (1) WHAT is my opinion, and (2)
WHY is my opinion relevant to my thesis
statement?
Commentary for previous detail:
1. A statistic like shows the poor state of
the education system.
2. If we are to help students become
successful adults, we need to change
they way we are educating our children.
33. Interpretation Example
Your commentary should answer the following
questions (1) WHAT is my interpretation, and
(2) WHY is my interpretation relevant to my
thesis statement?
Commentary for previous detail:
1. This shows that the high demand placed
on students during their college years is
too much stress for many.
2. However, the pressure of college is
reflective of a future career and helps to
prepare young adults for these
challenges.
35. Commentary
Character or Subject’s Feelings
Example
● Topic: cost of higher education
● Detail: For example, Benjamin
Davis, a recent college graduate
with a degree in Business,
struggled for many years to find
a job because of the recent
unemployment struggles in
America.
36. Your commentary should answer the following
questions (1) WHAT is the subject’s feelings ,
and (2) WHY is the subject’s feelings relevant
to my thesis statement?
Commentary for previous detail:
1. He like most, experiences extreme
frustration over spending time and
money obtaining a degree that gives him
very little advantage when searching for
a job.
2. As a result, many are left wondering is
higher education is worth the cost.
Character or Subject’s
Feelings Example
38. Commentary
Personal Reaction Example
● Topic: bullying
● Detail: Also, a bully might
speak cruelly in order to
intimidate, steal a student’s
belongings, or intentionally
exclude a student from a group.
39. Interpretation Example
Your commentary should answer the following
questions (1) WHAT is my personal reaction,
and (2) WHY is my personal reaction relevant
to my thesis statement?
Commentary for previous detail:
1. It is extremely upsetting to know that
most children undergo this type of
treatment at school.
2. It is hurtful, isolating, and can have
long-lasting psychological damage on
those students who experience bullying
often.
41. Commentary
Evaluation Example
● Topic: bears
● Detail: Naturally, a bear, when
threatened, will rise up from the
ground, growl loudly, and begin
charging at a speed of up to 35
mph.
42. Evaluation Example
Your commentary should answer the following
questions (1) WHAT is my evaluation, and (2)
WHY is my evaluation relevant to my thesis
statement?
Commentary for previous detail:
1. Although this is a frightening
experience, it is not entirely the bear’s
fault.
2. In fact most of the time a bear attack is
the result of an individual not realizing
that the woods is a bear’s environment
and means one must be cautious and
respectful of that environment.
44. Commentary
Types Tips
● Depending on your assignment,
choose the types of commentary
that best fits your argument.
● Use a variety of different types
of commentary to write a well-
argued paper.
46. Workshop
1. Go back and look at step two of
writing details from last week’s
presentation.
2. Update your commentary to fit
the “what and why” method,
using the commentary types you
just learned.
3. If you have not already done
that step, use the worksheet
found here.