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Self-Esteem or Christ Esteem?
1. Developing a High View of God, a Biblical View of
Others, and an Accurate View of Self
Marie Notcheva, Biblical Counselor
Institute for Nouthetic Studies (INS)
2. Three Basic Questions:
Who is God?
Who am I?
Who are other people?
What does God’s Word teach?
3. Who is God?
I. The MAJESTY of God
Psalm 93; 104
"The LORD reigns, He is clothed with majesty... Thy
throne is established from of old...“
II. The SOVEREIGN God
Definition: Sovereignty means that God, as the ruler
of the Universe, has the right to do whatever he wants.
Further, he is in complete control over everything that
happens. (Psalm 115:3; Daniel 4:35; Romans 9:20)
4. Who is God?
III. The OMNIPOTENT (all-powerful) and
OMNISCIENT (all-knowing) God
“Omnipotent” = unlimited authority. “And I heard as
it were the voice of a great multitude, and as the voice
of many waters, and as the voice of mighty
thunderings, saying, Alleluia: for the Lord God
omnipotent reigneth.” (Rev. 19:6; KJV)
“Omniscient” = “…His understanding is beyond
measure” (Psalm 147:5) and “He knows everything” (1
John 3:20
5. “The Christian’s instincts of trust and worship are
stimulated very powerfully by knowledge of the
greatness of God. But this is knowledge which Christians
today largely lack: and that is one reason why our faith is
so feeble and our worship so flabby. We are modern
people, and modern people, when they cherish great
thoughts of themselves, have as a rule small thoughts of
God. When the person in the church, let alone the
person on the street, uses the word God,
the thought is rarely of divine majesty.”
- J. I. Packer, “Knowing God”
6. Who is God?
IV. The UNCHANGING God
God’s character, purposes, and Truth do not change.
(Psalm 93:2; 102:26-27; James 1:17; 1 Samuel 15:29;
Isaiah 40:6-8).
God’s SON does not change – Hebrews 13:8
This should bring great comfort to the Christian! God is
not unpredictable like some human fathers.
7. Who is God?
V. The LOVING God
1. God IS love – “The one who does not love does not
know God, for God is love.” (1 John 4:8).
2. We are to be imitators of Christ (1 Cor. 11:1) – the most
important, central, crucial way we imitate Christ is by
LOVING other PEOPLE. (John 13:35; 1 Thess. 1:9)
3. God LOVES unbelievers (Mark 10:21; Luke 19) although
they do not enjoy the benefits of fellowship with Him
4. Love primarily not a feeling, but a commitment to the
other’s best.
5. The PERSONAL God – relates to each on a personal level
(Mary and Martha; Nicodemus – John 3)
8. Who am I?
I am a woman created by God in His image. My
responsibility as God’s creation is to glorify Him and
serve Him as He desires.
Even fallen man bears “image” of God; bears God-like
qualities such as love, kindness, beauty.
Believers represent Christ (Rom. 8:29; 1 Cor. 15:49)
9. Who am I?
How do I seek approval from
others?
What is my true identity?
How does my position in Christ
affect my “self-esteem”?
10. Who You Are in Christ:
- A Daughter of the King
(Eph. 1:5)
- A forgiven sinner
(Luke 7:48)
- Beautiful; precious to
God (1 Pet. 3:4)
- Accepted in the Beloved
(Eph. 1:6)
- God’s work of art
(Eph. 2:10) AND a work
in progress (Phil. 1:6)
- Loved everlastingly
(Jer. 31:3)
11. My Position in Christ
1 John 2:5; 2:28; 3:24; 2:28; 5:20; etc.
John is not talking about viewing our position in
Christ as a way to meet our emotional needs. “In
Christ” = our justified position
Carries with it the implication of obedience and being
conformed to the character of Christ - not seeking to
find “meaning” or personal fulfillment.
If we truly are “in Him”, we will walk in the light (1 John
1:7), overcome the evil one (1 John 2:14, 4:4), and have
fellowship with God and our fellow believers (1 John
1:3-7).
12. Who are Others?
Do the opinions of others control my thoughts or
behavior?
Do I fear disapproval or crave approval of others?
Do I seek ways to use other people to get my “needs”
met?
13. Who are Others?
Fellow image-bearers of God
Whom we are FREED to love without thought of reciprocation
When we stop viewing other people as “bigger” than God, we are freed
to LOVE and SERVE them – as Christ did!
God’s way out of the “slavery” of being controlled by other people’s
opinions is to know Him, as He is revealed in Jesus, in such a way that
other people will seem less awesome in comparison.
Being overwhelmed with Christ’s beauty breaks the “slavery” of being
controlled by others.
14. Does God Promote “Self-Esteem”?
God…..
Condemns self-love
2 Timothy 3:2
Isaiah 48:11
Romans 1:22
Psalm 8, “What is man?”
“Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain
conceit. Rather, in humility value others above
yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of
you to the interests of the others.” Philippians 2:3-4
18. In Conclusion…
We are far more loved than we can imagine.
Although we do not deserve it, Christ’s death and
resurrection on our behalf secures our true position in
Him, and seals our “identity” – as daughters of the
King.
This should give us far greater joy and meaning than
finding value/self-esteem in the temporary things of
this world!
Rest in Him and trust in His love.
19. About me..
Read my articles at The Biblical Counseling Coalition:
http://biblicalcounselingcoalition.org/blogs/author/marienotcheva/ or visit my blog at:
http://redeemedfromthepit.blogspot.com/
Editor's Notes
In Ed Welch’s book, “What Do You think of Me? Why should I care?” he encourages the reader to consider their answers to these questions. While we know what the Bible teaches about God’s greatness, our dependence on Him, and the trap of “fear of man” (insecurity based on other people’s opinions of us), how we react and the thinking we fall into on a day-to-day basis reveals our “practical theology” – what we really believe. This is what affects how we think and act.
What exactly is “self esteem”? Why does society teach us that we should esteem ourselves? Is there a sense in which what the world calls “self esteem” is actually healthy, since God loves us individually with an unconditional love? What does our position in Christ have to do with how we view ourselves? How we view others? How does GOD want us to see ourselves, and relate to His other children? In HIM we find our security and purpose. My goal for this short session is to get you thinking about how your position in Christ and view of God works together – to have a truly biblical, gracious view of yourself and others. One not based on the world’s values.
Most often mentioned in OT – Job; 1 Chronicles; Psalms; Isaiah; Daniel. Also 2 Peter 1:16 says “we were eyewitnesses to His MAJESTY’ in reference to Christ. Clearly a reference to Jesus Christ being God.
Goes along with His sovereign attributes; there is nothing too hard for Him ( Genesis 18:14) and nothing in all creation that is hidden from Him (Hebrews 4:13)
17 Verses in Bible about God’s omniscience: Psalm 147:5; Proverbs 15:3; Romans 8:29; Isaiah 46:10; Job 37:16; John 3:1-36; Rev. 13:8; Eph. 1:4; Romans 8:29-30; Isaiah 45:7; Isaiah 1:1-31; Hebrews 6:4-6; 2 Tim. 1:9; 1 Cor. 12:1-31; Romans 12:1-21; Romans 9:1-33; Daniel 7:1-28.
Heb. 13:7-8 - Remember those who led you, who spoke the word of God to you; and considering the[a]result of their conduct, imitate their faith. 8 Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever.
“Those” – NT teachers and OT prophets. Should be great comfort! We can rely solely on His Word; which is infallible and God-breathed – not on changing expectations of society or other people.
1 John 4 talks about the love that received from God we are to lavish on other people – we are going to talk more about 1 John a little later, when we get into understanding our “position in Christ”
Luke 19 – weeping over the city that was about to crucify him.
Difference in His relationship with believers and unbelievers – he loved us while we were still His enemies. Unbelievers are at enmity with God, yet He still loves them. He does not command us to do something He does not do Himself – commands us to “love” our enemies.
Only humans have moral capacity. Wronging another is evil because we are made in the image of God.
BANISHES INSECURITY
Contrast with term “identity in Christ” – not biblical; comes from psychoanalyst Eric Erickson’s “Identity Needs” theory. Stick to biblical terminology.
May seem obvious that we would never “use” other people, but that subtle pragmatic view is instilled in us early in society. Advertising is by definition needs-oriented; targeted towards the individual. “I need this” or “I deserve that”.
Once went to speak to a middle school teacher about the concept of “social health” in the curriculum, and asked how she would define what is “socially healthy” since that is subjective; differs according to society. She said “we want the kids to understand what their felt needs are, and how to use other people to meet those needs.” I responded that in our family, we teach our kids to esteem others more highly than we do ourselves, and to look out for the needs of OTHERS before their own!
At heart, we are all worshippers: “The thing or person you trust in is actually the object of your worship. Look carefully and you will see that what started off as a small concern about the opinions of other people has been supersized” (p. 39).
Welch discusses how good, loving relationships can go bad by comparing the God-given human desire for love to a 500-lb. gorilla demanding to be fed (p. 51). Welch demonstrates how everyday desires for approval and love can become things we desire inordinately – and lead to broken fellowship with God.
Christianity, however, offers something much greater than simply absence of suffering or a vague “harmony with the universe” sought by Taoists. We are invited to know the Creator intimately as Father; be awed by His majesty; and love others freely without thought of reciprocation. God’s way out is to know Him, as He is revealed in Jesus, in such a way that other people will seem less awesome in comparison. Being overwhelmed with Christ’s beauty breaks the “slavery” of being controlled by others.
Self-esteem is essentially sanctification by worth. – Jay Adams
If we are fundamentally self-centered, and we are by nature but to give in to that natural tendency, and we’re more focused on our own interests and how others are treating us, we’re BOUND to become unhappy for that reason alone! To begin to take an interest in OTHERS helps make a change for the better.
* Example from secular magazine about looks; people who love you don’t love u because of what you look like
This diagram shows the heart that CRAVES self-esteem as central to their motivation for living (represented by the heart). The circle represents the variety of negative emotions a person could experience. The “outer court” is a variety of random things that a person could seek worth or value from. The example shows the person getting angry because a person, or people, did not validate her the way she wanted. This is a perfect example of what the Bible calls “fear of man” – when we become insecure because of what someone else says, does, or doesn’t say or do – rather than finding contentment in knowing we serve the King and are loved by Him.
The proper view of self-esteem….God is on the Throne; we are His servant, child and disciple. Our joy is in Him.