1. This blog post is a schema for a session on confidence. The audience are trainee teachers and confidence in handling selection days. The aim is to enable you get better results and outcomes in persuading others. People can fail or be unsuccessful because they lack confidence, don’t understand their strengths or get overcome by unhelpful emotions. This blog will help you be more focused, confident and skilled to really get you message across to with other people so you can achieve your goals.First some stories........I was told a story by my Uncle about the time his Norwegian friend was competing in the world log cutting championships. The final had my the Norwegian, a pretty fearsome looking man pitched against a mountain of a man from Canada. The competition was simple, cut down as many trees as you can in 12 hours. By hand.On a loud blast of a hooter, the Norwegian and the Canadian started chopping. The two men matched each other stroke for stroke for the first hour. Then, my Uncle stopped. The Canadian cast an eye at the Norwegian and redoubled his efforts. After 10 minutes the Norwegian started again. After an hour, again he stopped. The Canadian sensing victory continued swinging his axe, with even more power. Every hour the same happened so when the hooter went for the last 15 minutes, the Canadian was supremely confident in being crowned world champion.A young Indian brave was filled with internal conflict. He went to the chief of the village and told him that he felt as though he had two wolves inside of him all the time. One of the wolves was brave and strong. He was filled with goodness and light for everyone and everything around him. But the other wolf was hostile, angry, and intolerant. It was always seeking to hurt everyone and everything around it. The young brave explained that some days one wolf was stronger, and other days the other wolf seemed to be winning.Oh mummy, mummyWhats the matter little kitten? Why are you crying?Oh mummy, mummy, I’ve lost my purrYou’ll find your purr little kitten. Just wait and seeOh dog, dog have you got my purr?Woof woof said the dog, licking his bone. I haven’t got your purr little kitten . This is my woof. Why don’t you ask Cow?Oh cow, cow have you got my purr?Moo moo said the cow flicking flies with her ears. I haven’t got your purr little kitten . This is my moo. Why don’t you ask Sheep?Oh sheep, sheep have you got my purr?Baa, baa said the sheep, munching grass in the field. I haven’t got your purr little kitten . This is my baa. Why don’t you ask wise old owl?Oh owl, owl have you got my purr?Hoot, hoot said the owl, blinking his big round eyes. I haven’t got your purr little kitten . This is my hoot Why don’t you go back and ask your mother?Presented here are some tools that enable you to reflect and gain insight into your thinking, provide focus and motivation by building on your strengths, construct effective messages and build rapport that will ultimately lead a good outcome. This blog covers beliefs, strengths, communication and motivation.Activity 1.What do you believe makes an excellent professional?Bloom's Taxonomy [for learning] describes three key ingredients that a professional needs to address:<br />Cognitive domain (intellectual capability, knowledge, or 'think')<br />Psychomotor domain (manual and physical skills, skills, or 'do')<br />Affective domain (feelings, emotions and behaviour, attitude, or 'feel')<br />Simply, this can be described as the things you know, the things you do and the the attitude you approach your work. The importance of attitude is made clear in the well known maxim:<br />“Attitude will determine your altitude in your career”.<br />I have a little game. In 2 minutes, I challenge someone to remember 40 objects in order and describing some detail it.Activity 2.If I asked you to undertake the challenge, how do your feelings change? What internal-chatter is happening in your head? What memories do you recall? Are they positive or negative. Are they helpful or hindering?This challenge is totally possible. I was amazed when I first came across the challenge and not only could I recall all objects in order with detail but so could the 50 or so people also present.Activity 3.What do you see.....<br />O p p o r t u n i t y i s n o w h e r e<br />This might give an indication if you are a glass half full or half empty person. Did you first read opportunity is now here? or opportunity is no where?In setting goals, for example to become a teacher, it is important your beliefs, thoughts and self talk are congruent with your goal. Many people do not realise their goals because of their limiting beliefs that then undermine their efforts. In a recent blog post I describe common barriers people create and describe ways to address the limiting beliefs we build around ourselves.Activity 4.When you think of your goal how do you feel? Relaxed, stretched, in panic or over the edge?What are internal chatter is there?Wow, all that talk of limiting beliefs has made me feel zapped. Positive psychology is a recent branch of psychology and it provides approaches that:<br />energise and re-energise<br />provide focus<br />motivate<br />give confidence<br />improve performance<br />A key tool is to know and work to your strengths. Research by Gallup has shown that when people do know and use their strengths they are more fulfilled, more effective and six times more likely to be engaged in their role.Conversely, Gallup research indicates that people who are not operating from strengths at work probably:<br />dread going to work<br />have more negative than positive interactions with coworkers<br />treat customers poorly<br />tell friends they work for a miserable organization<br />achieve less on a daily basis<br />have fewer positive and creative moments<br />Activity 5As a starter to getting to know your strengths; consider a time in the present (in the context of being an excellent professional in your specialty) when you have been at your best. Write down:<br />What was the task you were doing?<br />Who were you doing it with?<br />What are the others saying about you?<br />How did you look or sound?<br />What tools, approach or methods were you using?<br />Activity 6.Now get a bunch of colleagues to write down when they have seen you at your best, answering these questions?When you review these statements, notice how you feel? Hopefully this will start to give you an insight into your strengths another tool to use is the values into action tool or the Gallup strengthsfinderNow we feel more revved up and have a better picture or handle on personal strengths it is probably time to look at some tools to communicate effectively. The aim is to persuade others and get them to align to your way of thinking. Aristotle wrote that for persuasion to be truly effective, three elements must be present; logic, trust and emotions.Aristotle is in the line of great philosophers of Plato and Socrates. He understood the need for a well formed argument or presentation. To create one takes some planning. There are many tools around, I use two tools that I want to share that I find are great at providing structure to pull together a great presentation.Remember, sometimes the planning needs to be done quickly, in response to a question. Good knowledge of these tools will give you a great platform to work from in those situations.The 4MAT model allows the presenter to speak to all the different types of brains in the room at the same time. It is based on the learning format theory developed by David Kolb an educational theorist from Harvard University. The four sections for your presentation are:<br />Why? These learners want to know the reason for learning. This section is the hook. quot;
Divergersquot;
. This should describe the benefits that can be got and the problems that can be avoided. This section will have both toward and away from language,<br />What? These learners want to get the facts and concepts. quot;
Assimilatorsquot;
. This is the lecture. The specification of what the idea is<br />How? These learners want to practice and do something. quot;
Convergersquot;
. This is section addresses process. Maybe process to get it. Process to use it?<br />What if? These learners want to try out variations. quot;
Accommodatorsquot;
. This section is really in the detail. It may be used to answer frequently asked questions or to address issues that detract from agreements<br />Often, you will need to be persuade others that you are the one they need. In an interview or selection process that can be formal or informal, like that chance meeting on the train or whist being shown around a building. Rob Cameron has developed a range of great set of tools to help in getting the job you want. One of Robs tools that I particularly like is the Mnemonic iSPARK to frame your response to “tell me a time when” questions:<br />i must focus on I<br />S Situation. What was going on, what was not happening, what was the problem<br />P Part? Team leader, team member, leader, new starter?<br />A Actions Remember, focus on “I”!<br />R Result of your actions? What was improved? How? By how much?<br />K Knowledge did you gain? What might you do differently next time<br />Things to avoid saying, as well as abbreviations (a pet hate of mine) are ASSUMPTIONS. It is sometimes possible to be unaware of the assumptions we make. Remember,<br />We see things NOT as THEY are but as WE are<br />I have found 5 things you can do to recognise statements that might be assumptions:1. Look for significant absences or gaps in an argument.2. Invert an argument - try thinking about a position from the antithetical point of view, and imagine what is left out, what is emphasized, and why.3. Denaturalize what is taken for granted in an argument. Often, assumptions are preconceptions that have become fossilized or 'naturalized'. Often, these will be parts of an argument that the arguer, if questioned, would respond by saying 'well of course its only natural that x or y is the case/behaves this way'.4. Look hard at the major categorizations, definitions, and the configuration of key concepts that an argument uses. This will often point to the existence of important assumptions.5. Search for significant counterexamples/objections.<br />If you ASSUME you will make an ASS out of U and ME<br />The next step is key to get the message across to someone else. Aristotle recognised the need to now your audience. Why? Well because:<br />People like people like them<br />Matching and mirroring is the key. This idea has often been over sold and in an over-simplistic way, you may have some hindering thoughts. Lets put this straight, matching and mirroring is about the words we use, the tone we speak as well as our physiology or body language and breathing. If you need further evidence, there is an often quoted statistic about the relative importance of these factors in communicating a message:<br />Words form 10%<br />Tonality 40%<br />Body language 50%<br />How our audience interprets the world through their learning style is crucial to understanding how we you present your message. People can have a learning style with a influences from the kinaesthetic, auditory and visual styles. Most people do have one favoured style such that:<br />36% of people are mainly visual<br />40% of people are mainly kinaesthetic<br />25% of people are mainly auditory<br />To be like the people you are convincing, you need to step into their world and build the firm foundations that are needed to realise your goals. A previous blog post describes this in more detail.The following are generalizations on the characteristics of people with a preference for visual, auditory and kinaesthetic. Remember, with all generalizations, there are always exceptions.<br />VisualPeople with a visual preference, will tend to:<br />Be organized, neat and well-groomed. Why? Because they want to look good. And what do they expect from you? Yes, the same thing!<br />Use visualization for memory and decision making - often getting insights about something.<br />Be more imaginative and may have difficulty putting their ideas in words.<br />Speak faster than the general population. Why? Because they have a picture(s) in their mind and if it is a moving picture, there is a lot to tell in so little time!<br />Famous visual people include scientist such as Einstein and Picasso<br />AuditoryPeople with an auditory tonal preference, will tend to:<br />Perceive and represent sequences and are able to remember directions or instructions more easily.<br />Learn by listening and asking questions.<br />be easily distracted by noise.<br />Famous auditory people include song writers like Mozart, the Beatles, Paul Simon<br />KinaestheticPeople with a kinaesthetic preference, will tend to:<br />Speak slower than the general population. Why? Because they need time to get in touch with how they feel about the topic.<br />be more sensitive to their bodies and their feelings and respond to physical rewards and touching.<br />Learn by doing, moving or touching.<br />Famous Kinaesthetic people include Jimmy Connors, Jack Nicklaus and Chris Evert<br />Activity 7Describe your strengths in the style of a kinaesthetic, auditory or visual personWhat if you do if you feel anxious or get nervous beforehand, feel apprehensive or your notice your energies have shifted into a negative axis? What can you do? Here are three tools designed to help....Activity 8If you are feeling anxious, lets get precise, what are you anxious about specifically? Now, create an image of a successful outcome with the task you are anxious about completed. Notice all the things you see, hear, are saying to yourself and also the great feeling of achievement you have.Look back along our timeline from successfully doing the task to now. Now, ask yourself “where is the anxiety?”. Gone!If you are still anxious, ask yourself if you really are willing to let go with body and mind. Realise that anxiety is not good for the body. There are other ways to motivate yourself. The anxiety may illustrate there is a fear. Fear is not helpful and needs to be removed.Anchoring a positive emotionActivity 9Imagine a circle right in front of you. Then imagine a time you were totally motivated to get something. No, something bigger then that, a time when at the start you just knew you were going to get the outcome you wanted. As you remember that time, notice all the things you see, hear, are saying to yourself and also the great feelings. As the feeling of being motivated appears, step into the ring. After 10 - 15s, when the feelings subside, step out of the ring. Think of something else - the smell of baking bread.....Now, repeat the process at least 4 more times.Then jump in the ring without the visualisation, the feelings of motivation will appear....Reframe-chainThis is about changing how you perceive something to change your feelings and take you toward an optimum state. There may be 2 - 3 steps. Each new step should be one that will pull you into from the previous. An example:Nervous of an interview to<br />Curious about meeting people to<br />Energised by the possibilites<br />A final thought.When you define your goal. AFFIRM it.<br />We are what we think. All that we are arises. With our thoughts, we make our world. Buddha<br />I figured that if I said it enough, I would convince the world that I really was the greatest. Muhammed Ali<br />........and the stories<br />Little kitten padded back to its mummy. Mummy, mummy, no one has my purr. The little kitten snuggled up to its mummy. As little kitten curled up he started purring. Listen, said little kitten’s mummy, you didn’t lose lose your purr after all.The little Indian Brave considered the two wolves and he asked the chief. quot;
Can you tell me which one of these two wolves will eventually win out and gain control?quot;
quot;
It’s quite simple,quot;
replied the wise old man. quot;
The one that gains control and wins will always be whichever one you feed.quot;
Both loggers stood awaiting the decision. The Canadian seemed to look even taller than ever. You can imagine how surprised he was when the Norwegian was pronounced winner.How did you do that? he hollered at the Norwegian Every hour you stopped. How were you able to cut more timber than me? It’s just not possible!Its very simple replied the Norwegian, every hour, I stopped for 10 minutes and whilst you carried on cutting, I sharpened my axe.<br />