2. Sin #1
Too Many Fonts Disease
Please, limit
yourself to two
different fonts on
your website.
Serif + Sans Serif = True Font Love
3. Sin #2
Diet of Bad Color Choices
Two words: nail, salon. It's perfect for money
laundering, it's a high-volume, cash-preferred business
with a discreet workforce. Nobody does mista-meknow-nothing better than Mrs. Mukjayaporn and her gals.
Two words: nail, salon. It's perfect for money
laundering, it's a high-volume, cash-preferred business
with a discreet workforce. Nobody does mista-meknow-nothing better than Mrs. Mukjayaporn and her gals.
Not Enough or Too Much Contrast
Is the Work of the Devil.
4. Sin #3
Decorative Font Overdose
Ding, ding ding ding. Ding ding
ding ding ding ding. Ding. DING.
Ding ding, ding; ding ding ding
ding ding ding. Ding. Ding ding
ding ding, ding ding ding.
Consuming too many decorative
fonts can cause permanent nausea.
5. Sin #4
Chronic Capital Letter Fatigue
YOU... ARE TROUBLE. I'M SORRY THE KID HERE
DOESN'T SEE IT, BUT I SURE AS HELL DO. YOU ARE
A TIME BOMB. TICK, TICK, TICKING. AND I HAVE NO
INTENTION OF BEING AROUND FOR THE BOOM.
WELL... YOU KNOW HOW THEY SAY, IT'S BEEN A
PLEASURE? IT HASN'T.
Reading Capital Letters for too long
can cause hearing loss.
(Get it? It’s considered yelling.)
6. Sin #5
You have Comic Sans Cancer
Marie, I said Cheetos, not Fritos. I must've said Cheetos like
ten times. You need me to write it down for you? Well, I'm just
saying, y'know, I said Cheetos. Ch-ch-ch sound. Virtually
impossible to confuse Cheetos with Fritos it seems to me.
There’s nothing comical about it.
7. Sin #6
An Emphasis Epidemic
Don Eladio, please. I didn't sell anything. I apologize if you
are offended by my method of obtaining this meeting. I merely
took the initiative. I meant no insult.
Only use one. A widespread outbreak is cause
for great concern and may require a vaccine.
8. Sin #7
Microfont Dysfunction
Goodbye, Walter. I don't owe you a damn thing. All of this -- falling apart like this -- is on YOU. We had a good thing, you stupid
son of a bitch! We had Fring. We had a lab. We had everything we needed and it all ran like clockwork. You could've shut your
mouth, cooked, and made as much money as you ever needed. It was perfect. But no! You just had to blow it up. YOU! And
your pride and your ego. You just had to be the man. If you'd done your job, known your place, we'd all be fine right now.
Make sure your font size is at least 10px.
The only cure for microfont is enlargement.
9. Font
Surgeon
General
An Important message from the
Font Surgeon General and his BFF:
We hope that you recognize
the serious nature of these
deadly sins. A diet of standard
web safe fonts should be
strictly adhered to.
Neglecting to follow our
prescription, your website
will look schizophrenic.
Don’t let this happen to your
website. Please take action
immediately to avoid committing
one of these deadly sins.
Fontly Yours,
Thomas Typographer
Font Surgeon General
BFF
10. Gracias.
Please share this
presentation
and come say
“hola” online.
Alycia W
icker
www.mupplebee.com
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linkedin.com/in/ajwicker
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