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WELCOME TO BIBLE 
STUDY
EMOTIONAL RESTORATION 
RESTORING EMOTIONAL 
BALANCE 
MATTHEW 6:14-15 
MARK 11:25
THE FIVE LANGUAGES OF APOLOGY 
FIVE ELEMENTS OF APOLOGY 
๏‚ขExpressing Regret - "I am sorry" 
๏‚ขAccepting Responsibility - "I was 
wrong" 
๏‚ขMaking Restitution - "What can I do 
to make it right?" 
๏‚ขGenuinely Repenting - "I'll try not to 
do that again" 
๏‚ขRequesting Forgiveness - "Will you 
please forgive me?"
LEARNING TO FORGIVE 
๏‚ข If the person who offended you does not come back to 
apologize, then, according to Jesus, confront the offender. 
If he repents, forgive him. 
๏‚ข If the person does not apologize, release that person 
๏‚ข Don't allow the other person's refusal to apologize to keep 
you from apologizing. 
๏‚ข Be willing to apologize and admit your failures, regardless 
what the other person does.
SOMEONE WHO HAS BEEN HURT 
VERY DEEPLY OR OFTEN MAY NOT 
BE EMOTIONALLY, SPIRITUALLY, OR 
PHYSICALLY ABLE TO GENUINELY 
EXTEND FORGIVENESS RIGHT NOW. 
THEY MAY NEED TIME FOR 
EMOTIONAL OR PHYSICAL HEALING 
TO BUILD THE CAPACITY TO 
FORGIVE.
FORGIVENESS GIVES RENEWED LIFE 
TO RELATIONSHIPS. 
UNFORGIVENESS CAUSES EXTENDED 
PAIN.
WHEN WE COMMIT ACTIONS OR 
SPEAK WORDS THAT ARE 
DETRIMENTAL TO ANOTHER, THE 
CONSEQUENCES OF THOSE 
ACTIONS AND WORDS ARE NEVER 
FULLY REMOVED, EVEN WITH 
GENUINE FORGIVENESS. 
FORGIVENESS DOES NOT REMOVE 
ALL PAINFUL EMOTIONS. NOR 
DOES IT REMOVE THE MEMORY OF 
THE EVENT.
KEY INSIGHTS 
๏‚ข "When one's sense of right is violated, that 
person will experience anger. He or she 
will feel wronged and resentful at the 
person who has violated their trust. 
๏‚ขThe wrongful act stands as a barrier 
between the two people, and the 
relationship is fractured. They cannot, 
even if they desired, live as though the 
wrong had not been committed.
๏‚ข Something inside the offended calls for justice. It is these 
human realities that serve as the basis of all judicial 
systems.โ€œ 
๏‚ข "Genuine forgiveness removes the barrier that was created 
by the offense and opens the door to restoring trust over 
time.โ€œ 
๏‚ข "What most people are looking for in an apology is 
sincerity.โ€œ 
๏‚ข "An apology has more impact when it's specific. Be specific 
about what you are sorry about. Demonstrate by language 
that you understand how and how much you have hurt the 
person.
DO NOT FOLLOW WITH, "BUTโ€ฆ"! 
"ANYTIME WE VERBALLY SHIFT 
THE BLAME TO THE OTHER 
PERSON, WE HAVE MOVED FROM 
AN APOLOGY TO AN ATTACK. 
ATTACKS NEVER LEAD TO 
FORGIVENESS AND 
RECONCILIATION." "ANYTIME AN 
APOLOGY IS FOLLOWED BY AN 
EXCUSE FOR THE OFFENSE, THE 
EXCUSE CANCELS OUT THE 
APOLOGY
WE FAIL TO UNDERSTAND THE NATURE OF 
FORGIVENESS. FORGIVENESS IS ESSENTIALLY 
A CHOICE TO LIFT THE PENALTY AND TO LET 
THE PERSON BACK INTO OUR LIVES." 
"FORGIVENESS IS ALWAYS TO BE REQUESTED 
BUT NEVER DEMANDED." "โ€ฆWHEN YOU 
REQUEST TO BE FORGIVEN, YOU ARE MAKING A 
HUGE REQUEST. IT WILL BE COSTLY TO THE 
PERSON YOU HAVE OFFENDED. WHEN THEY 
FORGIVE YOU, THEY MUST GIVE UP THEIR 
DESIRE FOR JUSTICE. THEY MUST RELINQUISH 
THEIR HURT AND ANGER, THEIR FEELING OF 
EMBARRASSMENT OR HUMILIATION. THEY 
MUST GIVE UP THEIR FEELINGS OF REJECTION 
AND BETRAYAL. SOMETIMES, THEY MUST LIVE 
WITH THE CONSEQUENCES OF YOUR WRONG 
BEHAVIOR."
FINAL THOUGHTS 
๏‚ข"Forgiveness and trust are not to be 
equated. Because forgiveness is a decision, 
it can be extended immediately when one 
perceives he has heard a sincere apology. 
However, trust is not a decision-it is 
rather an emotion. Trust is that gut-level 
confidence that you will do what you say 
you will do." "Trust is that emotional 
sense that I can relax with you and don't 
have to be suspicious. I can let down my 
emotional guard because you will not 
knowingly hurt me.โ€œ
๏‚ข"Forgiveness does not remove the 
memory of the event." "If we have chosen 
to forgive, we take the memory to God 
along with the hurt feelings, acknowledge 
to Him what we are thinking and feeling, 
but thank Him that by His grace the 
offense has been forgiven. Then we ask 
God for the power to do something kind 
and loving for that person today. We 
choose to focus on the future and not 
allow our minds to be obsessed with past 
failures that are now forgiven."
RECEIVE THAT WORD!!!!!

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Emotional restoration (1)

  • 2. EMOTIONAL RESTORATION RESTORING EMOTIONAL BALANCE MATTHEW 6:14-15 MARK 11:25
  • 3. THE FIVE LANGUAGES OF APOLOGY FIVE ELEMENTS OF APOLOGY ๏‚ขExpressing Regret - "I am sorry" ๏‚ขAccepting Responsibility - "I was wrong" ๏‚ขMaking Restitution - "What can I do to make it right?" ๏‚ขGenuinely Repenting - "I'll try not to do that again" ๏‚ขRequesting Forgiveness - "Will you please forgive me?"
  • 4. LEARNING TO FORGIVE ๏‚ข If the person who offended you does not come back to apologize, then, according to Jesus, confront the offender. If he repents, forgive him. ๏‚ข If the person does not apologize, release that person ๏‚ข Don't allow the other person's refusal to apologize to keep you from apologizing. ๏‚ข Be willing to apologize and admit your failures, regardless what the other person does.
  • 5. SOMEONE WHO HAS BEEN HURT VERY DEEPLY OR OFTEN MAY NOT BE EMOTIONALLY, SPIRITUALLY, OR PHYSICALLY ABLE TO GENUINELY EXTEND FORGIVENESS RIGHT NOW. THEY MAY NEED TIME FOR EMOTIONAL OR PHYSICAL HEALING TO BUILD THE CAPACITY TO FORGIVE.
  • 6. FORGIVENESS GIVES RENEWED LIFE TO RELATIONSHIPS. UNFORGIVENESS CAUSES EXTENDED PAIN.
  • 7. WHEN WE COMMIT ACTIONS OR SPEAK WORDS THAT ARE DETRIMENTAL TO ANOTHER, THE CONSEQUENCES OF THOSE ACTIONS AND WORDS ARE NEVER FULLY REMOVED, EVEN WITH GENUINE FORGIVENESS. FORGIVENESS DOES NOT REMOVE ALL PAINFUL EMOTIONS. NOR DOES IT REMOVE THE MEMORY OF THE EVENT.
  • 8. KEY INSIGHTS ๏‚ข "When one's sense of right is violated, that person will experience anger. He or she will feel wronged and resentful at the person who has violated their trust. ๏‚ขThe wrongful act stands as a barrier between the two people, and the relationship is fractured. They cannot, even if they desired, live as though the wrong had not been committed.
  • 9. ๏‚ข Something inside the offended calls for justice. It is these human realities that serve as the basis of all judicial systems.โ€œ ๏‚ข "Genuine forgiveness removes the barrier that was created by the offense and opens the door to restoring trust over time.โ€œ ๏‚ข "What most people are looking for in an apology is sincerity.โ€œ ๏‚ข "An apology has more impact when it's specific. Be specific about what you are sorry about. Demonstrate by language that you understand how and how much you have hurt the person.
  • 10. DO NOT FOLLOW WITH, "BUTโ€ฆ"! "ANYTIME WE VERBALLY SHIFT THE BLAME TO THE OTHER PERSON, WE HAVE MOVED FROM AN APOLOGY TO AN ATTACK. ATTACKS NEVER LEAD TO FORGIVENESS AND RECONCILIATION." "ANYTIME AN APOLOGY IS FOLLOWED BY AN EXCUSE FOR THE OFFENSE, THE EXCUSE CANCELS OUT THE APOLOGY
  • 11. WE FAIL TO UNDERSTAND THE NATURE OF FORGIVENESS. FORGIVENESS IS ESSENTIALLY A CHOICE TO LIFT THE PENALTY AND TO LET THE PERSON BACK INTO OUR LIVES." "FORGIVENESS IS ALWAYS TO BE REQUESTED BUT NEVER DEMANDED." "โ€ฆWHEN YOU REQUEST TO BE FORGIVEN, YOU ARE MAKING A HUGE REQUEST. IT WILL BE COSTLY TO THE PERSON YOU HAVE OFFENDED. WHEN THEY FORGIVE YOU, THEY MUST GIVE UP THEIR DESIRE FOR JUSTICE. THEY MUST RELINQUISH THEIR HURT AND ANGER, THEIR FEELING OF EMBARRASSMENT OR HUMILIATION. THEY MUST GIVE UP THEIR FEELINGS OF REJECTION AND BETRAYAL. SOMETIMES, THEY MUST LIVE WITH THE CONSEQUENCES OF YOUR WRONG BEHAVIOR."
  • 12. FINAL THOUGHTS ๏‚ข"Forgiveness and trust are not to be equated. Because forgiveness is a decision, it can be extended immediately when one perceives he has heard a sincere apology. However, trust is not a decision-it is rather an emotion. Trust is that gut-level confidence that you will do what you say you will do." "Trust is that emotional sense that I can relax with you and don't have to be suspicious. I can let down my emotional guard because you will not knowingly hurt me.โ€œ
  • 13. ๏‚ข"Forgiveness does not remove the memory of the event." "If we have chosen to forgive, we take the memory to God along with the hurt feelings, acknowledge to Him what we are thinking and feeling, but thank Him that by His grace the offense has been forgiven. Then we ask God for the power to do something kind and loving for that person today. We choose to focus on the future and not allow our minds to be obsessed with past failures that are now forgiven."