5. INTRODUCTION 1
PRETEST 7
SECTION 1 Planning the Essay 17
LESSON 1 Thinking about Audience and Purpose 19
LESSON 2 Understanding the Assigned Topic 25
LESSON 3 Brainstorming Techniques: Freewriting and Listing 31
LESSON 4 More Brainstorming Techniques: The 5 W’s and Mapping 37
LESSON 5 Choosing a Topic and Developing a Thesis 43
LESSON 6 Outlining and Organizational Strategies 49
LESSON 7 More Organizational Strategies 57
SECTION 2 Drafting the Essay 63
LESSON 8 Thesis Statements and the Drafting Process 65
LESSON 9 Paragraphs and Topic Sentences 71
LESSON 10 Providing Support 77
LESSON 11 Strategies for Convincing 85
Contents
v
6. LESSON 12 Introductions 93
LESSON 13 Conclusions 99
SECTION 3 Revising, Editing, and Proofreading the Essay 105
LESSON 14 Revising: The Big Picture 107
LESSON 15 Revising Paragraphs 113
LESSON 16 Editing 121
LESSON 17 Proofreading 131
SECTION 4 Taking an Essay Exam 141
LESSON 18 Preparing for an Essay Exam 143
LESSON 19 Drafting, Editing, and Proofreading 151
LESSON 20 Sample Essay Exam Questions and Answers 157
POSTTEST 163
ANSWER KEY 173
ADDITIONAL RESOURCES 193
–CONTENTS–
vi
7. You probably can’t even count how many essays you’ve written for your high school classes. There are
essays assigned in English and composition classes, history and civics classes, and language classes.
Many electives even require essays. If you’re a junior or senior, you know that the stakes for essay writ-
ing keep getting higher. You’ll probably have to write one in class as part of an exam, and/or have a large part of
your grade based on an essay. But they’re not just worth grades—essays are also a part of high-stakes tests like the
ACT, Regents’, and SAT; and they’re required on college applications.
How can you improve your essay-writing skills, not only to get better grades, but also to score higher on tests
and boost your chance for admission to the college you’d like to attend? This book offers a step-by-step plan that
can be completed in just a few weeks.
How to Use This Book
There are 20 lessons in this book, each of which should take you about 20 minutes to complete. If you read five
chapters a week and complete the practice exercises carefully, you should become a more powerful and effective
essay writer in one month.
Although each lesson is designed to be an effective skill builder on its own, it is important that you proceed
through the book in order, from Lesson 1 through Lesson 20. The material in Section 2 references and builds on
what you’ll learn in Section 1, as Sections 3 and 4 reference and build on Sections 1 and 2. Writing is a process—
a series of skills, strategies, and approaches that writers use to create effective essays. In reality, this process isn’t
as linear this book presents. You might prefer to brainstorm first, and then write a thesis statement—and that’s
fine. However, once you understand the writing process, you can adapt it to your unique working style and to each
specific writing situation you encounter.
Introduction
1
8. The first section of the book, Planning the Essay, covers the basic prewriting steps that are essential to effec-
tive writing. Drafting the Essay, Section 2, shows you how to take your ideas and formulate a solid working draft.
In the third section, Revising, Editing, and Proofreading the Essay, you’ll learn how to shape your draft into a clear,
effective essay. Taking an Essay Exam, the fourth section, provides strategies for writing under the pressure of a
ticking clock, whether for an in-class exam or a test such as the ACT or SAT.
Each lesson includes several practice exercises that allow you to work on the skills presented in that lesson.
The exercises aren’t simply matching or multiple-choice questions. Instead, you’ll practice what you’ve learned by
doing your own writing. These practice exercises are central to your success with this book. No matter now many
examples you see, you really won’t benefit fully from the lessons unless you complete the exercises. Remember to
keep your practice answers as you work through the book—some lessons will ask you to further develop ideas gen-
erated in earlier practice exercises.
To help you stay on track, use the sample answers and explanations for the practice exercises at the back of
the book. Check them at the end of each lesson, reading the explanations carefully as you review your response
to the exercise. Keep in mind that there is no single correct answer to most exercises. What you’ll find instead are
suggested answers that contain all the elements called for in the exercise.
You’ll also find practical skill-building ideas at the end of each lesson—simple thinking or writing tasks you
can do to sharpen the skills you learned in that lesson. Some of these exercises ask you to read an essay and exam-
ine it for a specific element or detail. You can find essays in many places, such as an English or composition class
textbook, or on the Internet. If you have trouble finding appropriate writing, check the list of suggested reading
in the Additional Resources section at the end of the book.
To gauge your progress, we’ll begin with a writing pretest. You should take the test before you start Lesson
1. Then, after you’ve finished Lesson 20, take the posttest. The tests are different but comparable, so you’ll be able
to see just how much your understanding of the writing process and your writing skills have improved.
Different Types of Essays
What makes writing both interesting and challenging is that every writing task is unique. Writing is communi-
cation: You are expressing ideas about a subject to an audience for a purpose. Each time you sit down to write, one
or more of these three elements will be different, creating a unique writing situation.
Essays are one of many different forms, or genres, of writing. While there are many different kinds of essays,
general skills and strategies apply to all of them. This book will teach you those skills and strategies and help you
practice them. Specifically, we’ll help you apply those skills and strategies to three essay types:
■ The college application essay
■ Essays for high school and college classes (timed and untimed)
■ The standardized, timed essay exam (such as ACT, GED, Regents’, SAT)
Section 4 of this book (Lessons 18, 19, and 20) extensively covers the standardized, timed essay exams. Here is more
information about how to approach and successfully complete application and class assignment essays.
–INTRODUCTION–
2
9. The College Application Essay
Most colleges and universities require students to submit a written essay with their application. The nearly 300
schools that use the Common Application (www.commonapp.org) present five topics from which you must select
and write on one. Other schools use similar types of topics, or even ask you to come up with your own.
No matter the topic, though, the purpose of this essay remains the same: to reveal something personal about
you that will give the admissions department a better idea of who you are and why they should accept you. This
isn’t the time to wow your reader with your insights into current social problems or the poetry of the seventeenth
century. Your audience, an admissions officer, want to learn about you. A successful college application essay trans-
forms you from a two-dimensional applicant into a dynamic, three-dimensional “real”person. And in most cases,
the more real you are to the admissions officer, the more likely it is that he or she will accept you.
Of course, the application essay also gives the reader a sense of how well you can communicate in writing,
and that ability is crucial to your academic success. After all, admissions officers are not only looking to see if you’re
a good fit for the university—they also want to see that you’ll be able to handle their curriculum and that you can
read and write effectively at the college level.
Here are some Common Application topics and writing requirements found on most other applications:
1. Evaluate a significant experience, achievement, risk you have taken, or ethical dilemma you have faced, and its
impact on you.
2. Discuss some issue of personal, local, national, or international concern and its importance to you.
3. Indicate a person who has had a significant influence on you and describe that influence.
4. Describe a character in fiction, an historical figure, or a creative work (as in art, music, science, etc.) that has
had an influence on you.
5. A range of academic interests, personal perspectives, and life experiences adds much to the educational mix.
Given your personal background, describe an experience that illustrates what you would bring to the diversity
in a college community, or an encounter that demonstrated the importance of diversity to you.
6. Topic of your choice.
7. Submit a writing sample.
“Topic of your choice” and “submit a writing sample” allow you to recycle something you’ve written for a class,
or even another application (just be sure to change or delete any references to another school).
No matter which topic you select, remember that it is meant simply as a vehicle for revealing something about
you, not the historical figure, issue of international importance, or person who has influenced you. But being per-
sonal can be tricky. Anything and everything in your life or about your personality is not appropriate admissions-
essay material. College admissions officers note that the worst essays are depressing and/or paint an unflattering
picture of the applicant. Think of it this way: Your job in the essay is to get the reader to like you. Don’t hand him
or her a reason to reject you by revealing negative information. Your goal is to sound competent and responsible.
–INTRODUCTION–
3
10. Essays for High School and College Classes
In almost every high school or college class, you can expect at least part, if not all, of your evaluation for the term
to be based on your written work. In a college literature class, for example, 100% of your grade will probably be
based on two out-of-class essays, an in-class midterm, and a final essay, which may be a timed exam. In a politi-
cal science class, your midterm and final exams might include multiple-choice, short answer, and essay questions.
Your success in school depends heavily on your ability to write effectively, both in and out of the classroom.
Types of Essay Assignments
Essay assignments in high school and college classes will be as varied as the instructors who teach them. Most
assignments, however, will fall into one of two categories:
1. The Personal Essay
In composition classes and in college placement exams, you will often be asked to write an essay based on a
personal experience or observation. Here are two examples:
Alison Lurie wrote, “Long before I am near enough to talk to you in the street or at a party, you announce your
personality and opinions to me through what you are wearing. By the time we meet and converse, we have
already spoken to each other in an older and more universal language: the language of clothing.” Write an essay
in which you agree or disagree with this statement. Use evidence from your personal experience, observations,
or reading to support your position.
4
Here are a few other specific strategies to help you write a winning college application essay:
■ Avoid clichés. The typical admissions officer reads hundreds of essays each winter. You won’t stand out,
and you’ll run the risk of boring him or her, if you write about a subject also chosen by dozens of other stu-
dents. What’s been done too many times before? Here are a few subjects virtually guaranteed to bore your
audience: how you’ve been influenced by a famous person, the death of a grandparent, losing the big game,
why you want peace in the Middle East, etc.
■ Think local, not global. The small, uniquely personal experience is more revealing than your response to 9/11
or your plan to solve global warming. “Local,” or small, also guarantees that your essay will be original.
Choose a subject that you alone have found significance in, and you’ll have a better chance of writing the
kind of essay they’re looking for.
■ Don’t brag or overstate your importance. There is a fine line between appropriately advocating for yourself
and your talents, and sounding like a walking ego. In general, don’t take credit for anything you shouldn’t
(did your team really win the championship because of your leadership skills?).
■ Avoid offensive topics. You don’t know if your essay will be read by a 20-something, a 70-something, Demo-
crat or Republican, male or female, gay or straight, white or black, Christian or Buddhist. Therefore, the risk
of offending this unknown reader is great. You should steer clear of touchy subjects, and be careful not to
dismiss or critique the other side of your argument while laying out your own.
Tips for Success
11. Describe a time when you presented yourself as believing in something you really did not believe in. Why did
you present yourself that way? What were the consequences, if any, of this misrepresentation? How would you
present yourself in a similar situation today? Explain.
2. The Analysis Essay
In most other classes, essay assignments will often ask you to analyze specific texts, ideas, events, or issues.
Here are three examples from different disciplines:
From a religious point of view, what is truth? Use examples from two different religions to support your answer.
Analyze a local television news program. What stories and events get coverage? How are these stories and events
covered? What values and beliefs about America, about the world, and about television and its viewers do you
think the news program’s coverage reflects?
What illusions does Renoir’s film La Grande Illusion refer to? Discuss those illusions and how the historic
events that led to World War I helped foster them.
5
Here are some strategies for successful high school and college essays:
■ Fulfill the assignment. Have a clear thesis that directly responds to the assignment, and develop it as required.
■ Provide solid support. Whether you’re writing a personal essay or an analysis essay, you need to show read-
ers that your thesis is valid. Support your ideas with specific examples, evidence, and details.
■ Be correct. You need to convey your ideas clearly. Make sure your sentences are clear and free of errors in
grammar and mechanics.
■ Write with style. Most of your essays will be on the formal side, but that doesn’t mean they have to be dull
and dry. Choose interesting words that state exactly what you mean, including vivid verbs and specific adjec-
tives and adverbs.
Tips for Success
12.
13. Before you begin this book, it’s a good idea to find out how much you already know and how much
you need to learn about the essay-writing process. This test is designed to help you do that. It con-
sists of two parts. Part 1 contains 20 multiple-choice questions addressing several key components
in this book. Part 2 asks you to write your own essay and evaluate it according to the criteria provided.
You can use the space on the pages following Part 2 to record your answers and write your essay. Or, if you
prefer, simply circle the answers directly for Part 1. Obviously, if this book doesn’t belong to you, use separate sheets
of lined paper to write your responses.
Take as much time as you need for Part 1 (although 20 minutes is an average completion time). When you’re
finished, check your answers against the answer key at the end of this book. Each answer tells you which lesson
deals with the concept addressed in that question. Set aside another 30 minutes to complete Part 2.
Pretest
7
17. Part 1
1. All essays should be about five or six paragraphs long.
a. true
b. false
2. The best place in an essay for the thesis statement is generally
a. the first sentence in an essay.
b. the last sentence in an essay.
c. the end of the introduction.
d. in the third paragraph.
3. A good introduction should do which of the following?
a. grab the reader’s attention
b. state the thesis
c. provide the main supporting ideas for the thesis
d. both a and b
e. all of the above
4. Your relationship with your readers has an effect on how you write your essay.
a. true
b. false
5. Which of the following best describes the problem with the following paragraph?
Sullivan studied 25 city playgrounds. He found several serious problems. The playgrounds were dirty. They
were also overcrowded. They were also dangerous. Many parks had broken glass everywhere. Many parks also
had broken equipment.
a. lack of variety in sentence structure
b. grammatical errors
c. lack of transitions
d. poor word choice
6. Which organizational strategy does the paragraph in question 5 use?
a. compare and contrast
b. chronology
c. problem ➞ solution
d. order of importance
–PRETEST–
11
18. 7. Read the following essay assignment carefully.
Some say “ignorance is bliss.” Others claim that ignorance is a form of slavery and that only knowledge can set
you free. With which view do you agree? Explain your answer.
Determine which sentence below best describes the kind of essay you should write.
a. Explain the difference between “ignorance” and “knowledge.”
b. Explain which belief you concur with and why.
c. Explain how you think we can improve education.
d. Discuss the evils of slavery.
8. Which of the following organizational patterns applies to all essays?
a. order of importance
b. cause and effect
c. assertion ➞ support
d. problem ➞ solution
9. A thesis is best defined as
a. the prompt for an essay.
b. the main idea of an essay.
c. an essay that is at least three pages long.
d. the way a writer introduces an essay.
10. In the following paragraph, the first sentence is best described as which of the following?
More and more Americans are turning to alternative medicine. The ancient art of aromatherapy has gained a
tremendous following, particularly on the West Coast. Acupuncture, the traditional Chinese art of “needle ther-
apy,” has doubled its number of active practitioners in the past decade. And holistic medicine—treating the
whole body instead of just one part—is so popular that some HMOs now even pay for holistic care.
a. a transition sentence
b. a topic sentence
c. a supporting idea
d. a thesis
11. In the paragraph in question 10, the second sentence is best described as which of the following?
a. a transition sentence
b. a topic sentence
c. a supporting idea
d. a thesis
12. Which of the following should a conclusion NOT do?
a. Bring in a new idea.
b. Restate the thesis in fresh words.
c. Provide a sense of closure.
d. Focus on the reader’s emotions.
–PRETEST–
12
19. 13. Words and phrases like meanwhile, on the other hand, and for example are known as
a. passive words.
b. assertions.
c. modifiers.
d. transitions.
14. Which of the following strategies is particularly useful during an essay exam?
a. brainstorming
b. freewriting
c. outlining
d. journaling
15. Brainstorming typically takes place during which step in the writing process?
a. planning
b. drafting
c. proofreading
d. revising
16. Revising and proofreading are interchangeable terms.
a. true
b. false
17. Support for a thesis can come in which of the following forms?
a. specific examples
b. expert opinion
c. anecdotes
d. both a and b
e. a, b, and c
18. Never use a one-sentence paragraph.
a. true
b. false
19. What is the main problem with the following sentence?
Newman lost the election because of the fact that the opponent whom he ran against had a lot more money
for ads.
a. It’s a run-on sentence.
b. It’s not properly punctuated.
c. It’s unnecessarily wordy.
d. It lacks parallel structure.
e. There is no problem with this sentence.
–PRETEST–
13
20. 20. Which of the following strategies will make an essay more convincing?
a. avoiding run-on sentences
b. acknowledging counterarguments
c. providing specific examples and details
d. both b and c
e. both a and c
Part 2
Set a timer for 30 minutes. When you’re ready to begin, carefully read the following essay assignment. Use the space
provided to write your essay. Stop writing when 20 minutes have elapsed, even if you haven’t completed your essay.
When you’re finished, look at the scoring chart in the answer key to estimate your essay’s score.
Essay Assignment
Many people have been profoundly affected by great works of art. Describe a work of art—a book, a movie, a pho-
tograph, a drawing, a painting, a song, or a musical composition—that had a powerful impact on your life. What
work of art was it? How did it affect you? Why?
–PRETEST–
14
23. 17
S E C T I O N
1 Planning
the Essay
While creativity and inspiration can play an important role in good
essay writing, planning, drafting, and revision are critical. Whether
you have to write an essay in class, during a test, or at home, getting
down to the business of writing means focusing on these three things. In this section, you’ll
learn planning strategies that will not only improve the effectiveness and quality of your
writing, but will also help eliminate many of the frustrations writers face. In addition, they’ll
benefit your reader by showing him or her how the various points you make in your essay
work together and how they support your thesis.
When you begin your essay with planning, you will have guidance and direction
through the writing process, especially if you are in a timed situation. Planning lets you
see how your many developing ideas fit within a framework, and clearly maps out any type
of essay you are required to write.
24.
25. Imagine you’ve just had an amazing experience: You were able to save someone’s life by performing CPR.
You want to share the experience with three people: your father, your best friend, and the admissions offi-
cer at your first-choice college. How will you describe what happened? Will that description be the same
for each person? Probably not. Although the subject remains a constant, each person is a different audience, requir-
ing different word choices, levels of formality, and tone.
Because you are sharing the experience with these three people for different reasons, the purpose of your
description changes, too. You might tell your father to let him know that his advice about taking a CPR course
was invaluable. To your friend, you might stress the emotions the experience evoked. In your college application
essay, you place an emphasis on the experience’s revelation of your competent and responsible nature.
Audience and purpose not only determine how you write; they shape your content, or what you write as well.
Therefore, the first step to writing better essays is to understand who you are writing for and why you are writing.
L E S S O N
Thinking about
Audience and
Purpose
LESSON SUMMARY
The first step toward effective essay writing is to know why and for
whom you’re writing. This lesson explains how to understand your
audience and purpose and how these two factors affect your writing.
1
19
26. Understanding Your Audience
Imagine that you’ve been asked to write about your life-saving experience for the local hospital newsletter. You
expect your audience to be adults, so you plan and draft your article in anticipation of that audience. But when
you submit it, you find that the hospital plans to use your article in a supplement for elementary school students.
Can they print it as written? Not if they want their readers to understand what you’ve written.
Understanding your audience is a critical component of effective writing. Before you begin any type of essay,
you must find out:
1. Who will read your essay and why are they reading it?
2. What do they know about your subject?
3. What is your relationship with the reader?
Pinpointing Your Audience
If you’re writing for a teacher, you know his or her name and face, as well as the expectations he or she has for your
writing. But determining your audience doesn’t always mean knowing exactly who will be reading, grading, or
scoring your essay. In fact, often you’ll need to write for someone, or a number of people, you’ll never meet. For
example, if you are taking the ACT or SAT, you know that two people will read your essay and score it. You also
know the criteria for each score. You don’t know the readers’ names, or where they’re from, but you know
enough about what they’re looking for to understand how to write to them. Knowing your audience in this case
means knowing what they’re looking for.
In other words, your readers will pick up your writing in order to give it a grade or score. You need to know
their expectations in order to fulfill them. What does your English teacher consider an A essay? How does a col-
lege admissions officer judge an essay? For the SAT and ACT, what does the scoring rubric look like? What are the
differences between an essay that gets a 6, and one that gets a 2? Here are some general guidelines:
WHO THEY ARE WHAT THEY’RE LOOKING FOR
Admissions officer an engaging essay that reveals your personality, goals, and values; evidence that
you can organize your thoughts and communicate effectively
SAT and ACT scorers a polished rough draft that responds to the topic, develops a point of view, and sup-
ports that point of view with examples and evidence
AP Exam evaluators a clear and cohesive essay that demonstrates mastery of the subject matter
High school teachers a combination of the following: mastery of the material (do you understand the
book, concept, issue?); a clear and original thesis; mastery of the essay form (clear
thesis, strong support, logical organization); mastery of standard written English
Here’s an example. Imagine that you have been asked to write about a poem. Clearly, you could not write
the same essay for a college application and an English Literature AP exam. You have two different sets of actual
readers who want two very different things from you.
–THINKING ABOUT AUDIENCE AND PURPOSE–
20
27. Admissions officers, for example, would prefer a very personal response to the poem, one that reveals
something about who you are and what is important to you. They might want to know if the poem helps you bet-
ter understand something about yourself and your values. They might want to know how you understand the poem.
What does it mean to you? How does it make you feel? What do you get out of it? How can you relate it to your life?
The Audience’s Relationship to the Subject
In addition, it’s essential to consider the relationship of your audience to your subject. What are they likely to know
about your topic? How interested will they be in what you have to say? How likely are they to agree or disagree
with your ideas?
What Your Readers Know about the Subject
One of the biggest mistakes writers make is to assume that their readers know what they’re talking about. Just
because you know your subject intimately doesn’t mean your readers do. You need to carefully consider how much
your readers may know about your subject. For example, you’ve decided to write about your interest in robotics
for your college application essay. If you use terms like “range weighted Hough Transform”and “sensor fusion algo-
rithm,” chances are your readers won’t know what you’re talking about. You’ll either have to explain your terms
or replace the technical jargon with words the average reader can understand.
Similarly, say you decide to write about your favorite novel. Should you assume your readers have read the
novel? If they have, should you assume that they read it recently enough to remember its characters, plot, and
themes? Unless you know for sure, or unless your assignment specifically mentions an assumption (“assume your
readers have read The Great Gatsby carefully”), you must provide sufficient background information for your read-
ers. You’ll need to briefly summarize the plot and provide context for the specific scenes and issues you’d like to
discuss.
How Your Readers Feel about the Subject
Another important consideration is how your readers might feel about the subject. Will they be interested in it?
If not, what can you do to arouse their interest? If you’ve taken a position on an issue, how likely is it that your
readers will share your opinion? If they’re likely to disagree, how can you help them accept, or at least understand,
your position? (You’ll learn more about this issue in Lesson 11.)
Your Relationship to the Reader
Finally, there’s one more question to ask about your audience: What is your relationship to him or her? This rela-
tionship helps determine the style, tone, and format of your essay.
Though the writing situations discussed in this book are different, your relationship to the actual reader is
quite similar in each case: that of evaluatee to evaluator. The primary reason your actual readers—college admis-
sion officers, SAT and ACT scorers, AP essay exam readers, and teachers—are reading your essay is not for their
reading pleasure. Instead, they are reading to evaluate.
How does this relationship affect your writing? For most situations, it is in your best interest to be formal
(but not stuffy), respectful (but not overly gracious), and courteous (but not ceremonious). You must also fol-
low the provided guidelines or expectations. For example, if your instructor wants your essay typed in a 12-point
font, double-spaced, with one-inch margins, and one staple in the top left-hand corner, that’s exactly what you
should hand in.
–THINKING ABOUT AUDIENCE AND PURPOSE–
21
28. Practice 1
1. Briefly explain how to write for an audience that will remain unknown to you personally.
2. A Martian has just landed in your backyard. He asks where he’s landed. You answer, “America.” “What kind of
place is America?” he replies.
a. Who is your audience for this writing assignment?
b. Given your audience, how should you approach your topic, and why?
Knowing Your Purpose
Whether you’re writing a college application essay or an essay for your political science class, one of your goals is
to receive a positive evaluation for your essay. But for that to happen, the essay itself must have a clear purpose.
As important as knowing whom you’re writing for is knowing why you’re writing. What is the goal of your
essay? What are you hoping to convey through your writing? If your essay effectively achieves its purpose, you’re
more likely to achieve your goal of a high grade or score.
To help you clarify your purpose, you can try a simple fill-in-the-blank:
My goal in this essay is to .
Try to find a verb, or verbs, that best describe what you want your essay to do. For example:
My goal in the essay is to: demonstrate that I am a resourceful person.
explain why I took a year off after high school and show how that year prepared me
for college.
prove that Victor Frankenstein, rather than his creature, is the monster.
–THINKING ABOUT AUDIENCE AND PURPOSE–
22
29. Here are some other verbs that can help define purpose:
compare describe propose
contrast encourage review
convince explore show
defend inform summarize
Notice how the verb specifies purpose in the following example:
Herman Melville wrote, “He who never made a mistake never made a discovery.” In an essay, describe how a mistake
you made led to an important discovery.
My goal is to show how my mistake taught me an important lesson: If you don’t follow directions, someone can
get hurt.
By clarifying your audience and purpose, you can help ensure that your essay does what it’s supposed to, and
that its content, structure, and style will be right for its audience. Knowing what you want to say, to whom, and
why, should always be the first step in the writing process.
Practice 2
For this assignment, how would you describe your purpose?
Read Langston Hughes’s essay “Salvation.” In an essay, discuss the central conflict that Hughes describes. How does
Hughes resolve that conflict?
In Short
Effective writing begins with a clear understanding of audience and purpose. Know your audience: who will read
your essay, why they will read it, and what they already know about your subject. Consider your relationship to
your readers, and be sure to carefully consider your purpose. Why are you writing? What do you hope to achieve
in your essay?
–THINKING ABOUT AUDIENCE AND PURPOSE–
23
30. –THINKING ABOUT AUDIENCE AND PURPOSE–
24
Because a clear sense of audience and purpose is essential to good writing, you should be able to deter-
mine the intended audience and purpose of a given text. Select an article from a magazine or news-
paper, and read it carefully. Who is the primary audience? What was the writer trying to achieve?
Skill Building until Next Time
31. Whether you like the freedom of choosing your own topic or prefer to have the topic chosen for
you, one thing is certain: If you are writing an essay for a college application, the SAT or ACT,
an AP Exam, or a high school course, you must fulfill the assignment. If the assignment asks
you to write about a particular issue—year-round school, for example—you can’t expect to succeed if you write
about the need for campaign finance reform. On the SAT, failure to address the topic is grounds for a score of zero—
no matter how well you wrote your essay.
Even the most open-ended essay assignments have guidelines that must be followed. There may be a spe-
cific issue to address, an approach to take, or a length requirement to fulfill. When the assignment isn’t open ended,
there are even more constraints. But that’s not necessarily a bad thing. Assignments give you a framework within
which to work. That framework can not only guide you through the writing process, but can also eliminate the
time you would otherwise spend deciding on a suitable topic.
L E S S O N
Understanding
the Assigned
Topic
LESSON SUMMARY
This lesson explains how to break down an assignment to understand
exactly what is required.
2
25
32. Fulfilling the Assignment
The essay assignments found on college applications, AP Exams, and the SAT and ACT are the product of con-
siderable study and research. They are designed to elicit essays that fulfill a specific need. Colleges need to know
more about you in order to make admissions decisions, so they ask you to write about personal issues. The ACT
and SAT writing tests are designed to give colleges and universities a better idea of your writing aptitude. Even your
high school teacher, when he or she hands out an essay assignment, is looking for something specific.
You may think that writing about something other than what’s assigned portrays you as an independent
thinker, someone who can come up with ideas and doesn’t need to be told what to do. But that’s not the message
you’d be sending. If you’re doing your own thing and avoiding the topic, you’re telling your readers that you don’t
care about what they want, you don’t understand the topic, or you don’t know enough about the assigned mate-
rial to write about it.
Fulfilling the assignment, on the other hand, sends a positive message to readers. It tells them that:
1. You know how to follow directions.
2. You can handle the subject matter.
3. You can meet the challenge presented to you.
Additionally, in timed situations, fulfilling the assignment shows that:
4. You can organize your thoughts about a specific topic while under pressure.
Understanding the Assignment
In order to fulfill the assignment, you must understand exactly what the assignment is asking you to do. While
this sounds simple, consider that many essay assignments aren’t obvious. What does it mean, for example, to “dis-
cuss” an experience? How are you supposed to “analyze” an issue?
Breaking Down the Assignment
To comprehend an assignment, you need to understand the following:
■ What you are to respond to (the topic)
■ How you are to respond to it
In some cases, there may be more than one topic and more than one way you are supposed to respond. To
find out the expectations, break down the assignment. First, underline the words that describe the topic. Then,
circle all of the words that tell you how to respond. These “direction words”include analyze, describe, discuss, explain,
evaluate, identify, illustrate, and argue.
For example, here is a writing assignment from an AP Biology exam:
Describe the chemical nature of genes. Discuss the replicative process of DNA in eukaryotic organisms. Be sure to include
the various types of gene mutations that can occur during replication.
By breaking down the assignment, you can identify three subjects, each with its own direction word. The sub-
jects are underlined and the direction words are circled:
–UNDERSTANDING THE ASSIGNED TOPIC–
26
33. Describe the chemical nature of genes. Discuss the replicative process of DNA in eukaryotic organisms. Be sure
to include the various types of gene mutations that can occur during replication.
To help make the assignment even more manageable, break down the two parts (topic and direction words)
into a simple chart:
SUBJECT DIRECTIONS
1. the chemical nature of genes describe
2. the replicative process of DNA in eukaryotic organisms discuss
3. the various types of gene mutations that can occur during replication include
To completely fulfill the assignment, you must cover all three of these subjects in the manner in which the
assignment dictates.
When the Assignment Is a Question
In some assignments, you are given questions instead of direction words. Here’s an example:
What were the issues, successes, and failures of the Civil Rights movement from the 1960s through the 1970s?
Notice that there are no direction words. For this type of essay prompt, you will need to determine the word
or words yourself. Reread the question, paying careful attention to each word. Notice it begins with What were.
This is a good clue that you should identify the issues, successes, and failures.
Translating questions into directions can be tricky, but it’s a critical step in understanding the prompt. You
need to determine exactly how you’re supposed to respond to the subject. The following chart lists common ques-
tion words and corresponding direction words.
–UNDERSTANDING THE ASSIGNED TOPIC–
27
QUESTION WORDS WHAT THEY USUALLY MEAN
What is/are . . . define or identify
What caused . . . identify or explain
How are/does . . . explain or evaluate
How is X like . . . compare
How is X different . . . contrast
In what way . . . illustrate
Do you agree? argue
Why is/does . . . explain
What do you think of X? evaluate
34. Practice 1
Read the essay topics carefully. Use the subject and directions columns in the tables provided to break them down
into parts. (Note: You may not need to fill each table.)
1. Describe the change in citizens’ attitudes toward the federal government in the last decade. Explain what you
believe to be the causes of this change. Finally, assess the impact of this attitude on the power of the government.
SUBJECT DIRECTIONS
2. In Alice Walker’s novel The Color Purple, does Celie have control over her destiny? Explain your answer.
SUBJECT DIRECTIONS
3. Describe in detail the current definition of a planet. How does it differ from the definitions of stars and aster-
oids? If size becomes a defining characteristic of a planet, how will that change the solar system as we know it
today?
SUBJECT DIRECTIONS
–UNDERSTANDING THE ASSIGNED TOPIC–
28
35. Understanding Direction Words
You’ve broken down the assignment and isolated the direction words. But what do those direction words really
mean? In the following table, you’ll find the most common essay direction words and their explanations.
TERM MEANING
Analyze Divide the issue into its main parts and discuss each part. Consider how the parts interact and
how they work together to form the whole.
Argue Express your opinion about the subject, and support it with evidence, examples, and details.
Assess See evaluate.
Classify Organize the subject into groups and explain why the groupings make sense.
Compare Point out similarities.
Contrast Point out differences.
Define Give the meaning of the subject.
Describe Show readers what the subject is like; give an account of the subject.
Discuss Point out the main issues or characteristics of the subject and elaborate.
Evaluate Make a judgment about the effectiveness and success of the subject. What is good and bad
about it? Why? Describe your criteria for your judgment.
Explain Make your position, issue, process, etc. clear by analyzing, defining, comparing, contrasting, or
illustrating.
Identify Name and describe.
Illustrate Provide examples of the subject.
Indicate Explain what you think the subject means and how you came to that interpretation (what makes
you conclude that it means X).
Relate Point out and discuss any connections.
Summarize Describe the main ideas or points.
Here are a couple of examples:
Compare and contrast prohibition and the current anti-tobacco movement.
This assignment gives you two direction words: compare and contrast. Therefore, you should locate and dis-
cuss the similarities and differences between the two subjects (prohibition and the anti-tobacco movement).
Rousseau offers judgments about the relative goodness and badness of life as a savage and of life in society. Assess the
validity of these judgments. What arguments does he provide to support them? Are they sound arguments?
–UNDERSTANDING THE ASSIGNED TOPIC–
29
36. The explicit direction word in this assignment is assess. The implied direction word for the first question
“What arguments does he provide to support them?”is identify. The implied direction word for the second ques-
tion “Are they sound arguments?” is evaluate. For this assignment, you are expected to:
1. Assess the validity and soundness of Rousseau’s judgments.
2. Identify the arguments he uses to support his judgments.
3. Evaluate the strengths and/or weaknesses of his argument.
Practice 2
Reread the essay topics from Practice 1. Given the direction words, briefly summarize how you would approach
each essay. Do not use the specific direction words in your answers.
1.
2.
3.
In Short
For every writing situation you encounter, you must fulfill the requirements of the assignment. Break down the
assignment into its parts. Identify the subjects you must cover and the direction words that tell you how to address
those subjects. Then you can proceed by writing an essay that meets your evaluator’s expectations.
–UNDERSTANDING THE ASSIGNED TOPIC–
30
When you sit down to write an essay, you probably won’t have a copy of the direction word chart from
page 29. To familiarize yourself with the meanings of the words, write an assignment using each one.
Skill Building until Next Time
37. Many students procrastinate when faced with essay assignments for the same reason—they
don’t know what to write about. This is especially true when students are free to select the topic.
Instead of feeling liberated, they find themselves wishing for specific direction. Nowhere is this
more critical than in a timed essay exam, when you have to choose a topic quickly in order to complete the exam
within 20 to 30 minutes. Fortunately, a few simple strategies can help you generate ideas for any essay assignment.
Brainstorming Ideas
How do you generate ideas? Some writers stare at a blank page waiting for inspiration, while others dive into a
draft hoping ideas will come as they write. Both of these techniques take time and often result in disappointment.
There are more productive ways to come up with material for your essay—both in terms of time spent and in the
quality of that material. Whether you are assigned a topic, must come up with one on your own, or are writing
under a time constraint, taking the time to focus and shape your thoughts will result in a better final product.
L E S S O N
Brainstorming
Techniques:
Freewriting
and Listing
LESSON SUMMARY
Even the most experienced writers sometimes have trouble coming up
with ideas. This lesson teaches you two important techniques for gen-
erating ideas.
3
31
38. ■ Resist the temptation to look back at what you have written during the process.
■ If you can’t stay on topic, keep writing anything to maintain the flow.
■ Don’t censor yourself; no one will see your freewriting, so commit every thought to paper.
■ Follow your ideas wherever they lead you.
■ When finished, read your freewriting with a highlighter, noting the most interesting and strongest ideas.
■ Try the process again after you’ve focused your topic; more ideas may be generated.
Keys to Successful Freewriting
The most effective technique for focusing and shaping your thoughts is brainstorming—allowing yourself
some time to make connections with your subject, noting everything and anything that comes to mind. In this
lesson and the next, you’ll learn four specific strategies for brainstorming. They may be used both to generate new
ideas and to clarify those you already have. Brainstorming can also be used effectively when you are faced with a
number of possible essay topics and must determine which is the best vehicle to express your unique thoughts and
experiences. Some are better suited to a longer writing process, such as the college admissions essay, while others
may be adapted for when you have a shorter period to complete an essay, as with the SAT.
Freewriting
Freewriting is probably the best-known prewriting technique. It works well when you have some thoughts on a
topic, but can’t envision them as an essay. Freewriting also functions as a developmental tool, nurturing isolated
ideas into an essay-worthy one. People who use this technique often surprise themselves with what comes out on
paper. It is common to discover a thought or point you didn’t realize you had.
Specifically, freewriting means spending a predetermined period of time writing nonstop, focusing on a spe-
cific topic. In fact, freewriting should be called “flow writing,”because the most important aspect to this prewrit-
ing technique is the flow, or momentum, that comes when you stay with it. It works best when you write in full
sentences, but phrases are also effective. The key is to keep writing, without regard for grammar, spelling, or wor-
thiness of ideas. Your speed will help keep you from editing or discarding any ideas.
Freewriting Example
A student received the following essay assignment:
Adrienne Rich wrote: “Lying is done with words and also with silence.” Do you agree? Use your personal experience
and/or your observations to support your answer.
–BRAINSTORMING TECHNIQUES: FREEWRITING AND LISTING–
32
39. Here is the result of a short freewriting session:
Do I agree? I think so. Is it a lie if you don’t say something when you know something? Not technically, but it has
the same effect, doesn’t it? I remember when I saw Jay with someone else but I didn’t tell Karen. She never came
out and asked me if Jay was cheating on her, but I knew. But that’s not really a lie is it so what do you call it?
But there are more important cases where not telling the truth can be deadly. Like if you know someone is plan-
ning to commit a crime, and you don’t tell anyone. Didn’t someone go to jail for not telling the police she knew
about the Oklahoma City bombing before it happened? But that’s not a lie, it’s just not telling, so not telling is
not the same as lying. But it can have equally terrible consequences. I guess the point is that you know a truth
but you don’t reveal it. So they’re not the same but they do the same thing. People can get hurt. Unless you believe
what you don’t know won’t hurt you. But that probably falls into the same category as a white lie. It’s the other
lies and other silences that are the problem.
During her freewriting session, this student came up with a couple of examples and, through them, found
a tentative thesis for her essay. She also brought up some issues that will be central to her argument, including the
definition of a lie and whether people have a moral obligation to speak up when they have certain kinds of knowl-
edge. You can also see that the student has several run-on sentences, some repetition, and a very informal style.
That is part of the freewriting technique.
Practice 1
Using a separate sheet of paper or your computer, spend five minutes freewriting on the following essay assign-
ment. Remember, there is no wrong answer for this exercise as long as you address the topic. Keep your pen or
your typing fingers moving, don’t stop, and don’t edit or judge. Just set the timer for five minutes, and write.
In his essay “Urban Strategy,” William Rhoden describes a time that he put himself at risk to do what he thought was
right. Describe a time when you, like Rhoden, put yourself at risk (physically, socially, emotionally, academically) to
do what you thought was right. Was it worth the risk? Why or why not?
Listing
Listing is similar to freewriting in that it is a timed, flowing exercise meant to elicit many thoughts and ideas on
a given topic. However, instead of putting whole sentences or phrases on paper, this prewriting technique involves
creating a list. It might contain various individual thoughts, ideas that make sense in a particular order, and/or
ideas linked together by association with previous ideas.
Listing is a great brainstorming strategy for collaborative writing projects, which work best when they begin
with the entire group collecting ideas. In addition, unlike freewriting, listing works well in a timed writing situ-
ation. Even within the 25 minutes allotted for the SAT essay, spend a few minutes first listing your ideas before
beginning to write.
–BRAINSTORMING TECHNIQUES: FREEWRITING AND LISTING–
33
40. In this example, a student used listing to generate ideas for his college application essay.
In your opinion, what is the greatest challenge your generation will face? What ideas do you have for dealing with this
issue?
■ Being overwhelmed by technology
■ Staying in physically touch when everything becomes virtual
■ How will we know what’s real?
■ If people live longer, what about the generation gap?
■ Find better ways to take care of parents, and grandparents
■ Being overwhelmed by information
■ What about the people who don’t have access to technology—social inequality
■ The environment
■ Slow consumption of our resources
■ Recycle more
■ Come up with alternative fuel sources
■ World government?
■ Disease—new viruses—bird flu?
■ What about our new power for destruction, biowarfare?
Practice 2
Take three to five minutes to brainstorm a list of ideas for the following assignment:
Many forces contribute to our sense of self. What is a strong determining factor for your sense of identity?
34
■ If you are not already being timed, set a timer for at least 15 minutes (the more time you spend, the more
and better ideas you will probably come up with).
■ Write every word or phrase that comes to mind about your topic. If you have not selected a topic, write an
answer to the question(s), “What do I have to say to my audience?” or “What do I want my audience to know
about me?”
■ As with freewriting, do not edit or censor any ideas, and ignore the rules of spelling, grammar, and punctuation.
■ When you are finished, look over the list carefully. Cross out useless information, and organize what is left.
Categorize similar items.
How to Use Listing
41. In Short
Two effective ways to generate ideas are the freewriting and listing brainstorming techniques. Simply write non-
stop about your assignment for a set period of time, either going across the page in sentences (freewriting) or down
the page in a list (listing). Don’t judge your ideas, and don’t edit. The more freely you write, the easier it will be
to tap into your creativity—and the more ideas you’ll come up with.
–BRAINSTORMING TECHNIQUES: FREEWRITING AND LISTING–
35
Use the freewriting and listing techniques for any kind of writing or thinking tasks this week. For exam-
ple, if you have to buy a gift for a friend, brainstorm a list of ideas. Or, if you have to make an important
decision, freewrite about the pros and cons for five minutes.
Skill Building until Next Time
42.
43. People learn and process information in many different ways. Some of us learn best by seeing, oth-
ers by hearing, and still others by doing. Some of us prefer a defined structure or framework, while
others think best when there are no constraints. For those who like structure, the 5W’s (who, what,
where, when, why) offer an easy framework for generating ideas. For visual learners and thinkers, graphic organ-
ization tools like mapping work best.
Asking Questions
Asking “who, what, where, when, and why”is a formula that journalists, detectives, and researchers use to get a com-
plete story. This technique is particularly useful when you’re choosing an essay topic and when focusing a topic once
you’ve made a selection. There are two sets of questions for taking stock, one suited for an impersonal or research-
type essay, and the other geared toward a personal essay. Unlike some of the other brainstorming techniques, you
should ask questions deliberately, with great thought given to each question. Do not rush or include every idea that
comes to mind. Even if you are being timed, take a moment to give the best answer you can for each question. The
better focused your answers, the more information you will have to use in your essay.
L E S S O N
Brainstorming
Techniques:
The 5 W’s
and Mapping
LESSON SUMMARY
This lesson describes two more techniques for generating ideas for
your essays: asking reporters’ questions and mapping.
4
37
44. 1. Who: Who is involved? At what level? Who is affected?
2. What: What is your topic? What is its significance? What is at stake? What are the issues?
3. Where: Where does your subject occur? Where is its source?
4. When: When does your topic occur? When did it begin/end? When must action be taken to deal
with it?
5. Why: Why is your subject of interest? Why did it develop as it did? Why should others be interested
in your topic?
If you are writing a research paper or other type of nonpersonal writing, and your topic is already selected
or assigned, concentrate on the standard W’s: who, what, where, when, and why. These questions will help you
quickly develop a great deal of information about your subject. Not every question will apply to every essay, and
the prompts that follow each W are meant to be taken as suggestions. Be flexible, and use the format as it best fits
your topic.
––BRAINSTORMING TECHNIQUES: THE 5 W’S AND MAPPING–
38
1. Where have you been (chronological history)?
2. What have you accomplished or achieved?
3. What do you do with your time when not in school?
4. What are you good at? Passionate about?
5. Who are/were your major influences?
Admissions essays and some exit essays are intended to be personal, so you must focus on yourself. Take time
answering personal questions such as the following. This process involves a different set of W’s, meant to elicit
key information about you and about the topic if it has been chosen.
Here’s how the 5 W’s might work for the following assignment:
Television is a very powerful medium.What do you think is the ideal place of television in our lives, and why? Explain.
How close is the reality to that ideal?
Who watches TV?
What kinds of shows are people watching?
What happens to kids who watch too much TV? (affects schoolwork, relationships with others?)
What about people who have no TVs? Are they more informed? Less informed?
What do people expect from TV? Relaxation? Information? Entertainment?
Where do people place TVs in their homes? Kids’ rooms? (effect on family relationships, socialization?)
Bedroom? (effect on sleeping/relaxation?) Kitchen? (effect on conversation during meals?)
45. What effect does TV have on our lives? Hurts us? Helps us?
What if we got rid of TV?
When was TV invented?
Why do people watch TV?
Notice the number of questions and the amount of possible essay material this student was able to gener-
ate. Some of the questions are more relevant to the assignment than others (“when was TV invented” probably
won’t be relevant, for example). But clearly, this student has many ideas to work with. In the next lesson, you’ll
learn how to use a brainstorming session like this to develop a thesis and organize your essay ideas.
Practice 1
Use the 5 W’s technique to generate ideas for the following assignment.
School uniforms for public school students is among the most controversial proposals for education reform in Amer-
ica. Where do you stand on this issue? Defend your position.
Mapping
Mapping is a graphic (visual) organizer that allows you to investigate the relationships between many diverse ideas.
It’s a simple process best used for exploring simple topics. To make a map, draw a circle and add spokes radiat-
ing from it. Put your central idea or subject in the middle, and add subtopics or related ideas around it in any order.
Or, draw a box with your subject written in it and continue adding boxes, connected to each other by arrows, show-
ing the development of your idea. As with other brainstorming techniques, don’t judge yourself during this process.
Write down any and every thought you have on your subject.
––BRAINSTORMING TECHNIQUES: THE 5 W’S AND MAPPING–
39
46. 40
How I have
been influenced
by my English
teacher
personal
philosophy
reading
choices
strength
in dealing
with difficult
issues
discipline
learned
life lessons
from assigned
reading
not afraid
to assign
tough
material
push
yourself past
what you
think you are
capable of
use words
and action
to show others
who you
really are
makes us
ask and answer
the hard
questions
at least
30 minutes
of reading
a day
5 minutes
of writing
a day
found
positives
in battle
with cancer
Example of a Concept Map
This student came up with four main branches of ideas—discipline, reading choices, personal philosophy, and
strength in dealing with difficult issues. The map shows how one idea led to another and how ideas are related
to one another. That’s an advantage of this technique: You can see immediately where your ideas lie. Clearly,
this student has much to say about discipline as it related to his teacher’s influence on him.
For the next assignment, notice how the resulting map differs from the previous example.
47. Outlining is another important essay-planning tool, but it is not a brainstorming technique. Outlining is an orga-
nizational technique that helps in planning an essay after ideas have been generated through brainstorming.
You’ll learn more about outlining in Lesson 6.
A Note about Outlining
Discuss how sports influence popular culture.
Practice 2
Use the mapping technique to brainstorm ideas for your answer to this college application essay assignment. Write
your answer on a separate sheet of paper or type it on your computer.
Write an essay that conveys to the reader a sense of who you are.
trends
Leading
sports figures
product
placement
commercial
endorsements
How sports influence
popular culture
television/
media
footwear/
fashion
fashion
industry
fans
––BRAINSTORMING TECHNIQUES: THE 5 W’S AND MAPPING–
41
48. In Short
To generate ideas for an essay, try asking questions using the 5 W’s: who, what, where, when, and why. Or try a map:
Put your topic in the middle of a page and see your ideas develop in relationship to one another.
––BRAINSTORMING TECHNIQUES: THE 5 W’S AND MAPPING–
42
Use the 5 W’s and mapping techniques for any kind of writing or thinking task this week. For example,
if you need to decide whether to join the drama club or get a part-time job, you can use the 5 W’s tech-
nique to help you come up with the pros and cons for each choice. Similarly, you could use the map-
ping technique to see how taking a part-time job would affect your life.
Skill Building until Next Time
49. You’ve done some brainstorming and you’ve generated many ideas. Now, how do you turn those ideas
into an essay?
First, accept that many of those ideas will never go farther than your brainstorming notes. Think
of the brainstorming process of as a type of “rehearsal,” in which you try on different ideas or approaches. You
won’t be able to use them all. Instead, you’ll choose the very best for your “performance”(your essay). Somewhere
in your brainstorming notes is at least one great idea that you can develop into an effective essay.
L E S S O N
Choosing a
Topic and
Developing
a Thesis
LESSON SUMMARY
This lesson explains how to narrow your topic so that it is sufficiently
focused. You’ll also learn how to develop a tentative thesis for your
essay.
5
43
50. Rules of Thumb for Choosing a Topic
The writing process involves making many decisions. You begin by deciding what to write about. To ensure that
you make a good choice, follow these four rules. The topic you choose must:
1. be interesting to you and your audience
2. fulfill the writing assignment
3. be sufficiently focused
4. be able to be turned into a question
Capturing Interest
The first rule for choosing a topic is simple: Make certain it holds your interest. If it’s not interesting to you, why
would it be to your reader? Your lack of enthusiasm will be evident, and your writing is likely to be dull, dry, and
uninspired as a result. If you are interested in your topic, you can convey that feeling to your reader, no matter
what the subject. Your reader will be drawn in by your lively prose and passionate assertions.
But what if you aren’t really interested in any of the ideas you came up with while brainstorming? What if
the assignment is about a subject you find dull? The challenge in this situation is to find some approach to the topic
that does interest you. For example, your contemporary American politics teacher has asked you to write an essay
about a healthcare policy issue—something you’ve never thought or cared much about. Your first brainstorming
session resulted in a number of ideas, but nothing interesting enough to keep you writing for five pages. In that
case, it makes sense to brainstorm again, using another method.
Before you begin, make a short list of some of the things that do interest you. Even if they seem totally unre-
lated to the subject, you may be able to make a connection. For example, one student listed the following five areas
of interest:
• music
• driving
• snowboarding
• Tom Clancy novels
• the Internet
She then saw several possible connections with her topic, even before brainstorming again. She could write about
healthcare coverage for music therapy, healthcare policy resources on the Internet, or how accident statistics affect
healthcare policies.
Finding a Focus
Essay assignments often ask you to write about a very broad subject area. For example, your topic might be to write
about the Cold War or about a novel you read in class. You can approach such boundless assignments in
many ways.
To write a successful essay, you need to focus your topic. If, for example, you are given the topic of genetic
engineering, you must find a specific issue or idea within that broad topic. Otherwise, you will have enough material
–CHOOSING A TOPIC AND DEVELOPING A THESIS–
44
51. for a book. You might decide to write about how genetic engineering is used to find cures for diseases, to create
“super” crops, or to plan a family with “designer” children.
In other words, you need to focus your material so it can be adequately covered within the confines of the
essay. If you try to cover too much, you’ll have to briefly mention many subtopics, without delving into the “meat”
of your topic. If your topic is too narrow, though, you’ll run out of ideas in a page or two, and probably fail to meet
the requirements of your assignment.
It may take time to sufficiently focus the topic. Here’s how one student narrowed it down:
Assignment: Write a statement for your generation.
Broad topic: My generation
Narrowed topic: My generation’s beliefs
Further narrowed topic: My generation’s beliefs about work
Sufficiently narrowed topic: My generation’s beliefs about the balance between work and play
It took three steps, but her “sufficiently narrowed topic”has the right level of focus and can be adequately exam-
ined within the essay structure.
Turning Your Topic into a Question
A thesis is the main idea of an essay, and is a response to a topic. In the previous example, the student narrowed
her topic to “my generation’s beliefs about the balance between work and play.”To come up with a thesis, she can
restate that topic in the form of a question: “What are my generation’s beliefs about the balance between work and
play?” The answer to that question might be, “My generation believes that life should be made up of equal parts
of work and play.”
She might never use that sentence in her essay; she could reword it while writing, or after writing, a first draft.
Nevertheless, this exercise gives her a point from which she can launch into writing. Here are two more examples
of the evolution of a tentative thesis from an assignment, a focused topic, and a question.
Assignment: Describe how you think the federal income tax system should be reformed
and why.
Broad topic: Reforming federal tax system
Narrowed topic: Problems with the federal tax system
Further narrowed topic: Inequalities in the federal tax system
Sufficiently narrowed topic: How to eliminate inequalities in the federal tax system
Topic turned into a question: How can we eliminate inequalities in the federal tax system?
Tentative thesis: Instituting a flat tax will eliminate inequalities.
–CHOOSING A TOPIC AND DEVELOPING A THESIS–
45
52. Assignment: Write an essay that explores one of the many issues raised in Frankenstein.
Broad topic: An issue in Frankenstein
Narrowed topic: Responsibility
Sufficiently narrowed topic: Responsibility of the creator to his creation
Topic turned into a question: What is the responsibility of the creator to his creation?
Tentative thesis: If the creation is a living being, then the creator is responsible for nurturing
and educating his “child.”
When Assignments Ask Questions
Essay assignments that pose a question allow you to quickly formulate a thesis. In fact, they are often called “thesis-
bearing”assignments for that reason. For example:
Television is a powerful medium.What do you think is the ideal place of television in our lives, and why? Explain. How
close is reality to that ideal?
Both questions are thesis bearing. Here is a student’s freewriting response.
I think the ideal place of television is that it should be for information and entertainment, but that it shouldn’t
be watched too much. The reality is far from the ideal because too many people spend too much time watching
TV to the point that they don’t communicate with each other or do things that they should be doing to be phys-
ically and emotionally healthy (examples: exercise or homework).
This answer is a good tentative thesis. It explains how the student feels about the subject, it responds to the assign-
ment, and it is focused.
–CHOOSING A TOPIC AND DEVELOPING A THESIS–
46
53. Practice 1
For the following assignment, identify a broad topic, narrow it, and turn it into a question and tentative thesis.
Assignment: Identify a factor that you believe figures strongly in a child’s personality
development. Explain how that factor may influence the child.
Broad topic:
Narrowed topic:
Further narrowed topic:
Sufficiently narrowed topic:
Topic turned into a question:
Tentative thesis:
Practice 2
Return to one of your brainstorming sheets from Lesson 3 or 4. Use the steps outlined in the four rules for choos-
ing a topic, and write a tentative thesis.
–CHOOSING A TOPIC AND DEVELOPING A THESIS–
47
54. In Short
To write an effective essay, you need a topic that interests you and fulfills the assignment. It must be sufficiently
focused so the amount of material you will cover can be adequately explored within the confines of an essay. Nar-
row down your topic until you can turn it into a specific question. The answer to this question should serve as
your tentative thesis—the main idea that you will address and develop in your essay.
–CHOOSING A TOPIC AND DEVELOPING A THESIS–
48
Choose topics and develop tentative thesis statements for the other three brainstorming exercises you
completed in Lessons 3 and 4.
Skill Building until Next Time
55. Now that you have a tentative thesis, you may be tempted to jump right in and start drafting. Some-
times, this approach works, especially if you’ve done a lot of brainstorming, have thought care-
fully about your assignment, and your writing skills are strong. More often, however, a great essay
is the product not only of brainstorming, but of organization as well.
The Assertion ➞ Support Structure
Before discussing common organizational strategies, it’s important to consider the underlying structure of essays.
Whether an essay is organized by chronology, comparison and contrast, cause and effect, or some other strategy,
every essay has the same underlying structure: assertion ➞ support. That is, the essay asserts an idea (its thesis)
and then supports the thesis with specific examples, evidence, and details.
This assertion ➞ support structure is then repeated throughout the essay on many levels. The ideas that pro-
vide support for the thesis (major support) are assertions themselves, and therefore need support. The structure
then looks something like this:
L E S S O N
Outlining and
Organizational
Strategies
LESSON SUMMARY
In this lesson, you’ll learn about the underlying structure of an essay and
how to create an outline. We’ll also examine some of the common orga-
nizational strategies used by essay writers.
6
49
56. Main idea (thesis)
Major supporting idea
Minor supporting idea
Support
Minor supporting idea
Support
Major supporting idea
Minor supporting idea
Support
The exact underlying structure will vary depending upon the number and type of supporting ideas, but in all its
variations, it is the foundation for most essays.
The Benefits of an Outline
Generating an outline before you draft an essay will help you in several ways. First, it will give structure to your
ideas. By mapping out the order in which those ideas will flow, you create a roadmap for the drafting process. The
roadmap assures that you won’t veer off topic, helps prevent writer’s block, and speeds up drafting.
Second, an outline will help you determine where you need more support for your thesis. When you create
an outline, you’ll be able to see any gaps in the development of your ideas. Strongly supported assertions stand
out in contrast to weaker ones.
Third, an outline will help judge the plausibility of your thesis. If you jump into drafting without organiz-
ing first, you may find during the writing process that your thesis doesn’t hold up. A good outline can help you
revise, modify, and/or strengthen your thesis before you begin writing. Specifically, a good outline will tell you if
your thesis is:
■ too broad. If you have trouble including everything in your outline, you probably have too much to say.
Your thesis needs to be more focused.
■ too narrow. If you can’t seem to find enough to say, your thesis might be too focused. You need to broaden it
to create a viable essay.
■ unreasonable. If there isn’t sufficient evidence to support your thesis, you should reconsider its viability.
You may need to take a different stance.
■ underdeveloped. If you have many gaps in our outline, you may need to do more thinking or research to
find sufficient support.
–OUTLINING AND ORGANIZATIONAL STRATEGIES–
50
57. Kinds of Outlines
If you have to drive somewhere you’ve never been before, you could just get in the car and start driving, hoping
your sense of direction will be enough to land you at your destination. More likely, though, you will consult a map
and write down some directions. But how carefully should you plan your trip? Do you want to map out each gas
station where you’ll need to fill up, and each rest stop where you’ll get coffee? Or do you simply need a list of route
numbers and turns you’ll need to take?
How thoroughly you map out your trip depends on many different factors, such as your familiarity with the
terrain and the distance you’ll be traveling. The same is true in writing. Do you need a detailed, formal outline
that lists every major and minor supporting idea, or just a rough “scratch”outline? Again, the answer depends upon
several factors, including how comfortable you are with your thesis, how well you follow a structured outline, and
how many ideas you’ve developed through you brainstorming sessions. It also depends upon the writing situa-
tion. During a timed essay exam, you’ll only have time to make a list of paragraphs and, very generally, what you’ll
write about in each one.
Informal Outlines
An informal, rough, or scratch outline is one that lists only the major supporting ideas in the order in which you
think you should develop them. Here’s an example on an informal outline.
Assignment: Evaluate the proposal to replace the current graded income tax system with a flat tax. Should we insti-
tute a flat tax system? Why or why not?
1. Introduction—thesis: A flat tax would be good for the government and for citizens.
2. Problems with current system
3. How flat tax works
4. Benefits of flat tax system
a. for government
b. for citizens
5. Conclusion
This outline provides a general structure for a draft. It’s not very detailed—it doesn’t include the minor sup-
porting ideas or specific examples the essay needs to be fully developed, but it can function well as a roadmap to
guide the writer through a first draft.
–OUTLINING AND ORGANIZATIONAL STRATEGIES–
51
58. Formal Outlines
A formaloutline is much more detailed. It includes specific, supporting details and several levels of support. Here’s
a part of a formal outline for the same assignment:
I. Describe problems with the current system.
A. complex
1. tax rates vary greatly
2. too many intricate details
B. unfair
1. deductions, loopholes, special interests
2. people with same income can pay different amount of taxes
C. wasteful
1. different forms for different people
2. huge administrative costs
3. huge compliance costs
4. advising costs
II. How flat tax works
A. all citizens pay same rate—17%—for income over a set minimum
B. all citizens get same personal exemption
C. no breaks for special interest
D. no loopholes
III. Benefits
A. citizens
1. sense of fairness—all treated equally
2. poorest pay no taxes
3. simple to calculate and file
4. families save more
5. more faith in government
6. people will save and invest more
B. government
1. streamline IRS
a. reduce cost
i. fewer employees
ii. less paper, printing, etc.
iii. less auditing costs
2. healthier economy
–OUTLINING AND ORGANIZATIONAL STRATEGIES–
52
59. Common Organizational Strategies
Essay organization doesn’t stop, however, with the underlying assertion ➞ support structure and an outline. A
number of effective strategies can organize your information and ideas, comprising a logical, easy-to-understand
flow for your essay.
Chronological/Sequential
One way to organize your material is by chronology, or time sequence. Put ideas in the order in which they hap-
pened, should happen, or will happen. This method works best when you are narrating or describing an experi-
ence, procedure, or process. Imagine writing about the way a bill is passed in Congress, but the steps needed to
complete the process are out of chronological or sequential order. The point or points you are trying to make about
that process will get lost in the ensuing confusion.
Here is a sample rough outline using chronology as its organizing principle.
Assignment: Describe a time when you and a family member experienced a deep sense of conflict or when you sharply
disagreed about an important issue. What caused the conflict? What was the outcome? Have your feelings about the
matter changed or remained the same? Explain.
Tentative thesis: When I decided to become a vegetarian, my parents refused to support me. It was very difficult to
stick to my decision—but I’m glad I did.
Rough outline:
1. telling my family
2. their reactions
3. trying to explain my reasons
4. flashback: taking the “virtual tour” of the slaughterhouse on the Web
5. offering to take my family on the tour, but only Wei watching it with me
6. Mom and Dad refusing to cook special meals for me
7. learning to cook for myself
8. Wei accepting my decision and trying some vegetarian meals with me
9. Wei giving up meat too
10. Mom and Dad accepting our decision and supporting us
Practice 1
On a separate sheet of paper or your computer, create an outline using chronology as your organizational prin-
ciple. Your outline can be rough or formal. Use one of your brainstorms from Lesson 3 or 4, or one of the brain-
storms provided as an example to create your outline.
–OUTLINING AND ORGANIZATIONAL STRATEGIES–
53
60. Whenever you write about cause and effect, keep in mind that most events have more than one cause, and most
actions generate more than one effect.
Cause and Effect
Another way to organize ideas is using cause and effect. This method works in either direction:
1. cause ➞ effect: what happened (cause) and what happened as a result (effect)
2. effect ➞ cause: what happened (effect) and why it happened (cause)
Like chronology, cause and effect can be the main organizational structure or it can be used to organize a
specific part. It can also be used in combination with other organizing principles. For example, if your assignment
were to discuss the events that led to World War I, you would probably use cause and effect as well as chronology
to organize your ideas.
Here’s part of an outline for an essay about the effects of the Industrial Revolution on city life.
Industries moved to cities
Large influx of working class from rural areas—looking for jobs
Crowded, unsanitary conditions
Children in the streets (unsupervised) or working in factories (uneducated)
Demand for more hospitals, police, sanitation, social services
Spatial
Ideas can also be organized according to spatial principles, from top to bottom, side to side, or inside to outside,
for example. This organizational method is particularly useful when you are describing an item or a place. You’d
use this strategy to describe the structure of an animal or plant, the room where an important even took place,
or a place that is important to you.
The key to using spatial organization effectively is to move around the space or object logically. You are using
words to relate something that exists physically or visually, and must help your reader understand your ideas. Don’t
jump around. What follows is a rough outline for an essay using the spatial organizing principle. The student works
from the outside of a cell to the inside as she describes its structure:
Structure of an animal cell:
1. Plasma membrane
a. isolates cytoplasm
b. regulates flow of materials between cytoplasm and environment
c. allows interaction with other cells
–OUTLINING AND ORGANIZATIONAL STRATEGIES–
54
Note about Cause and Effect
61. 2. Cytoplasm
a. contains water, salt, enzymes, proteins
b. also contains organelles like mitochondria
3. Nuclear envelope
a. protects nucleus
4. Nucleus
a. contains cell’s DNA
Practice 2
On a separate sheet of paper or your computer, create an outline using either the cause and effect or spatial organ-
izing principle. Your outline can be formal or informal. Use one of your brainstorms from Lesson 3 or 4, or one
of the brainstorms provided as an example to create your outline.
In Short
Organizing your ideas to create an effective essay is done on a number of different levels. Underlying all essays is
the assertion ➞ support structure. For every idea or assertion you make, you need to provide examples, evidence,
and details as support. An outline provides a roadmap that not only helps you in the drafting process, but also
lets you see where your ideas may need more development or support. Within the outline, ideas can be arranged
using a number of strategies. Chronology or time sequence, cause and effect, and spatial arrangements should be
chosen and employed based on the type of information you are writing about.
–OUTLINING AND ORGANIZATIONAL STRATEGIES–
55
In a well-organized essay, the writer’s organizing principle should be very clear. Find an essay that
appears to be organized by chronology, cause and effect, or spatial principles. Develop an outline from
the text so you can see the organizational structure clearly.
Skill Building until Next Time
62.
63. In the previous lesson, you learned ways to organize ideas according to time and space. Now, you’ll exam-
ine four additional principles of organization:
1. analysis/classification
2. order of importance
3. comparison and contrast
4. problem ➞ solution
Analysis/Classification
Some essays are best organized by arranging ideas, items, or events by their characteristics or functions. The fol-
lowing assignment is broad enough to describe many different strategies.
L E S S O N
More
Organizational
Strategies
LESSON SUMMARY
This lesson describes four more organizational strategies for essays:
analysis/classification, order of importance, comparison and contrast,
and problem ➞ solution.
7
57
64. Plants and animals protect themselves in many different ways. Describe the various strategies organisms have devel-
oped for protection.
It makes sense to group similar strategies together and organize your essay by type (classification). A for-
mal outline to address the assignment might look like this:
I. Appearance
A. camouflage
1. moths
2. flounder
3. walking stick
B. warning colors
1. monarch butterfly
2. coral snake
3. South American poisonous frog
C. mimicry
1. king snake resembling coral snake
2. swallowtail butterfly larva resembling snake
3. snowberry fly resembling jumping spider
II. Chemicals
A. smoke
1. squid
2. octopus
B. smells
1. skunks
2. others?
C. poisons
1. spiders
2. snakes
3. bombardier beetles
III. Armor
A. spikes, thorns
1. roses and thistles
2. sea urchins
3. porcupines
B. shells, hard coverings
1. nuts
2. beetles
3. turtles
–MORE ORGANIZATIONAL STRATEGIES–
58
65. Notice how the protective strategies are first classified into three categories: appearance, chemicals, and armor.
Each of these categories is then further classified for analysis. Appearance, for example, is broken down into three
types of protection strategies: camouflage, warning colors, and mimicry.
Order of Importance
One of the most frequently used organizational strategies, order of importance is often the main organizing prin-
ciple of an essay. Even when it’s not, it’s used in individual sections and paragraphs. It works in both directions,
as cause and effect does. You can begin with the most important, and work toward the least, or begin with the least
important, and finish with the most.
Most important generally means most supportive, most convincing, or most striking. For example, the outline
you just read lists several protection strategies. While the overall organizing principle is analysis/classification, most
sections within that larger structure are also organized by order of importance. Look again at the section on
appearance:
I. Appearance
A. camouflage
1. moths
2. flounder
3. walking stick
B. warning colors
1. monarch butterfly
2. coral snake
3. South American poisonous frog
C. mimicry
1. king snake resembling coral snake
2. swallowtail butterfly larva resembling snake
3. snowberry fly resembling jumping spider
“Appearance”is one of the essays’ major supporting ideas. The three minor supporting ideas—camouflage,
warning colors, and mimicry—are listed in order of importance. Camouflage is the most common and least sophis-
ticated of the three, whereas mimicry is the most unique and most compelling way that animals use appearance
to protect themselves. And for each of these three supporting ideas, three specific examples are provided. Again,
they are listed in order of importance, from the least striking example to the most compelling.
Whenever you’re building an argument (and in most essays, that’s exactly what you’re doing), it’s most effec-
tive to start with the least important idea and move to the most important. A good argument is like a snowball
rolling down a hill. It builds momentum and strength as it rolls, one idea building upon another. And because
you’re working to convince readers that your assertions are valid, it helps to use this structure. In many cases, your
least important ideas are probably also the least controversial and easiest to accept. It makes sense to begin with
those that your reader will most likely agree with, and build the reader’s trust and acceptance as you work toward
more difficult concepts.
–MORE ORGANIZATIONAL STRATEGIES–
59
66. Practice 1
On a separate sheet of paper or your computer, create an outline using analysis/classification or order of impor-
tance as your organizing principle. Your outline can be formal or informal. Use one of your own brainstorms from
Lesson 3 or 4, or one of the brainstorms provided as an example.
Comparison and Contrast
Essays that show the similarities and differences between two or more ideas use the comparison and contrast orga-
nizational strategy. This strategy depends upon first having comparable ideas or items. For example, you’d have
difficulty writing a successful essay if you wanted to compare Frankenstein’s creature with Cinderella. Franken-
stein’s creature and Pinocchio, on the other hand, are comparable items—they’re both beings that someone else
brought to life. Often, comparable items have a number of aspects that may be compared and contrasted. You might
compare and contrast the creation of the figures, their creator’s reactions after they come to life, and/or their rela-
tionships with their creators.
After you’ve selected the aspects you’ll compare and contrast, there are two ways to organize your discus-
sion: the block technique and the point-by-point technique.
The Block Technique
This method organizes ideas by item (A and B). First, discuss all the aspects of item A (ideas 1, 2, and 3). Then,
discuss all of the corresponding aspects of item B. The result is two “blocks”of text—a section about item A, and
one about item B. For example:
(A = Pinocchio; B = Frankenstein’s creature)
A1—Pinocchio’s creation
A2—Geppetto’s reaction
A3—Relationship between Pinocchio and Geppetto
B1—The creature’s creation
B2—Frankenstein’s reaction
B3—Relationship between the creature and Frankenstein
The Point-by-Point Technique
In this method, you organize ideas by aspect (1, 2, 3) rather than by item, so the result is a direct comparison and
contrast of each aspect. Because you put each aspect side by side, readers get to see exactly how the two items meas-
ure up, element by element. This is a more sophisticated way of organizing a comparison and contrast essay, and
it’s easier for your reader to follow. Here’s a sample outline.
–MORE ORGANIZATIONAL STRATEGIES–
60
67. A1—Pinocchio’s creation
B1—The creature’s creation
A2—Geppetto’s reaction
B2—Frankenstein’s reaction
A3—Relationship between Pinocchio and Geppetto
B3—Relationship between the creature and Frankenstein
Problem ➞ Solution
In this organizing principle, you first identify a problem, and then offer a solution. There is no room for flexibil-
ity, because it won’t make sense to your reader to offer the solution to a problem without first revealing or dis-
cussing that problem. Here’s the “solution”section of an outline for an essay about the problem of misinformation
on the Internet.
III. Solution
A. Create “reliability index”
1. ranks sites for level of credibility
2. run by not-for-profit; perhaps university or consortium of universities
3. organization would rate websites on scale of trustworthiness (fact-check, etc.)
a. Priorities
i. sites offering information about health and healthcare
ii. sites offering information about raising children (education, emotional, social
development)
iii. sites offering information about finances and investments
B. Run awareness campaign
1. public service announcements
2. lessons in schools
3. announcements by all Internet providers
Practice 2
On a separate sheet of paper or your computer, create an outline using comparison and contrast or problem ➞
solution as your organizing principle. Your outline can be formal or informal. Use one of your own brainstorms
from Lesson 3 or 4, or one of the brainstorms provided as an example.
–MORE ORGANIZATIONAL STRATEGIES–
61
68. In Short
Analysis, order of importance, comparison and contrast, and problem ➞ solution are four more strategies to help
organize your ideas. One strategy can serve as an overall organizing principle, while others may help you organ-
ize individual paragraphs and sections of your essay.
–MORE ORGANIZATIONAL STRATEGIES–
62
Look for an essay that uses the analysis/classification, comparison and contrast, order of importance,
or problem ➞ solution strategy. Work backward from the text to create an outline that delineates the
organizing structure.
Skill Building until Next Time
69. 63
S E C T I O N
2 Drafting
the Essay
Now that you’ve done some planning, you’re warmed up and ready to
run. The lessons in this section will show you how to draft a successful
essay, from introduction to conclusion. You’ll learn how to support your
ideas with evidence and details, and how to make arguments that are more convincing.
70.
71. The planning steps in Section 1 have led you to the next stage in the process, writing a rough draft. You
broke down the assignment, brainstormed ideas, focused your topic, developed a tentative thesis, and
sketched an outline. All of that work has provided a framework that you can now flesh out with sen-
tences and paragraphs that bring your ideas to your audience.
What Is Drafting?
To draft means to create a preliminary version or rough form of a text. Preliminary and rough are the key words.
Like brainstorming, drafting is most effective when you allow yourself to write imperfectly. Unless you’re writ-
ing a timed essay exam, such as for the SAT or ACT, your essay will take final shape after revising. (And even the
graders of those timed essays exams make it clear that they’re looking for a “polished rough draft,” not a perfect
piece of writing.) The point of drafting is to get your ideas on paper within the framework you created in the plan-
ning stages, but without the pressure of trying to get it exactly right.
L E S S O N
Thesis
Statements
and the
Drafting Process
LESSON SUMMARY
In this lesson, you’ll learn how to create a rough draft from your brain-
storming notes. You’ll also find out how to craft a strong thesis
statement.
8
65
72. Instead of staring at a blank piece of paper, at your outline, and then back at the paper, get writing. It’s espe-
cially important not to waste time trying to write an eloquent, attention-grabbing introduction. The best intro-
ductions are typically written after the body of the essay, when your ideas and the manner in which you reveal them
are on paper. That’s why the lesson on introductions doesn’t appear until after the lessons on writing good para-
graphs and providing support for your ideas and assertions.
Tips for the Drafting Process
Use the following guidelines to help keep your ideas flowing during the drafting stage:
■ Keep your thesis statement and assignment in front of you at all times. This will keep you focused on what
your essay needs to do.
■ Follow your outline, but be flexible. Don’t feel obligated to stick to your original plan if, as you’re writing,
you come up with a better order of paragraphs, or a new idea.
■ Save your drafts. Whether they’re on paper or on the computer, keep a copy of every version of your essay.
(That means, on the computer, you will need to make a copy of your draft into a new document before
revising.) You may find that an idea you thought you weren’t going to use will have a place in your essay
after all.
Practice 1
Briefly describe your typical writing process. How have you handled drafting in the past? What can you do to make
drafting more productive?
66
■ Don’t know what to say? Try one of the brainstorming techniques described in Lessons 3 and 4.
■ Don’t know where to begin? Create an outline. This will help you put your ideas in order and give you a
road map to follow.
■ Can’t think of the right way to start? Skip the introduction and instead jump into the body of your essay.
Once you know where you’re going and what you have to say, come back and create an effective
introduction.
Tips on Overcoming Writer’s Block
73. Drafting a Thesis Statement
While you don’t need to start with an introduction, you should have a thesis statement before you begin draft-
ing. Your thesis is the main idea of your essay—it succinctly reveals what you’re going to say. In Lesson 5, you
learned how to narrow your topic and formulate a tentative thesis. Now, you’ll either commit to that thesis, or revise
it into a workable thesis statement.
Here are a few more considerations:
1. A good thesis statement makes a strong, clear assertion that conveys your attitude about the subject.
No assertion: The School of Rock is about a substitute teacher.
Mild assertion: The School of Rock is an entertaining film about an influential substitute teacher.
Strong assertion: The School of Rock is about how a substitute teacher uses the transformative power of
rock and roll to help his students and himself.
2. A good thesis statement strikes the right balance between too broad and too narrow. It needs to be focused
enough to encompass just enough material to cover within the spatial confines of the essay, and narrow
enough to include enough material that can be supported by evidence.
Too broad: Animals have developed many strategies for survival.
Some focus: Animals have developed many strategies to protect themselves.
Focused: Many animals have developed physical properties that serve to protect them from
predators.
Too narrow: In “The Open Boat,” the repetition of “If I am going to be drowned” conveys Crane’s
theme of the indifference of nature.
Balanced: In “The Open Boat,” Crane uses several stylistic techniques to convey his theme of the
indifference of nature.
3. A thesis statement is not simply an announcement of the subject matter. You need to tell readers what you
are going to say about your subject.
Announcement: This paper will discuss some of the erroneous theories about the causes of the Great
Depression.
Thesis statement: The Great Depression was caused neither by the stock market crash of 1929 nor the
Smoot Hawley Tariff Act.
–THESIS STATEMENTS AND THE DRAFTING PROCESS–
67
74. Admissions officers typically spend about three to four minutes on each application essay. They’re not bound
by any rule that says they have to read each one from start to finish. The best way to guarantee a full read and
a better chance that your essay will help the admissions officer put your application in the “yes” pile is to hook
the reader, and only gradually reveal your subject. If you hand your subject, and your treatment of that subject,
to him or her in the opening paragraph, you’re providing a great reason to stop reading.
4. A thesis statement is not simply a question or list of questions. You still need to tell your reader what idea
you are going to develop in your essay (the answer to one or more of your questions).
Question: Why did Kafka choose to turn Gregor into a giant beetle?
Thesis statement: Gregor’s transformation into a giant beetle is a powerful symbol representing his indus-
trious nature and his role in his family both before and after his transformation.
5. A thesis statement is not simply a statement of fact. It must be an assertion that conveys your ideas about
the subject.
Statement of fact: There are many important similarities between the Perrault and Grimm versions of
Little Red Riding Hood.
Thesis statement: Both the Perrault and Grimm Brothers versions of Little Red Riding Hood reveal the
authors’ negative attitudes toward women.
Where Your Thesis Statement Belongs
While there is no rule that states exactly where you should place your thesis statement, because it helps your reader
by identifying your purpose, it should appear within the first or second paragraph of your essay. You want your
reader to know before they read too much what idea you will develop. Think of it this way: Imagine someone you
don’t know calls you on the phone. After she introduces herself, you expect that she’ll tell you why she’s calling.
What does she want? If she doesn’t tell you, you could become annoyed, suspicious, and even angry. You deserve
the courtesy of an explanation, and so does your reader. That explanation is your thesis statement.
While you should have a good working thesis statement to lead you through your draft, it’s important to
remember that even that statement is a draft. It’s your preliminary version, and as you write, you may find you
need to revise it. Be flexible. It makes more sense to revise it based on what you’ve written (if the writing works)
than to revise a decent draft to fit your thesis.
–THESIS STATEMENTS AND THE DRAFTING PROCESS–
68
The College Admissions Essay Difference
