How to Tame the Elephant in the Room- 6 steps to build trust and close deals!

TRIAL LAWYER COMMUNICATION TIPS FOR EVERYONE!
I’LL BE PICKING A JURY A WEEK FROM
MONDAY IN A DIFFICULT AND TRAGIC
WRONGFUL DEATH CASE.
MitchJackson.com 800.661.7044

VOIR DIRE OR JURY SELECTION IS THE
OPPORTUNITY FOR ME TO LEARN MORE
ABOUT MY JURY…

AND MY JURY GETS TO LEARN MORE
ABOUT ME.

IT’S ALSO THE TIME TO DEAL WITH BIG
ISSUES THAT EVERYBODY KNOWS
ABOUT BUT NOBODY WANTS TO TALK
ABOUT.

THE ELEPHANT
IN THE ROOM.

IN THIS SLIDESHARE I AM GOING TO
SHOW YOU HOW TO DEAL WITH AND
EVEN TAME THE ELEPHANT IN THE
ROOM.

IT’S IMPORTANT THAT YOU IMMEDIATELY
DEAL WITH ELEPHANTS BECAUSE IN
TODAY’S NOISY WORLD, GETTING AND
KEEPING SOMEONE’S ATTENTION AND
EARNING THEIR TRUST CAN BE A
CHALLENGE.

THERE’S PROBABLY NO MORE DIFFICULT
OF A PLACE TO GAIN TRUST THAN IN A
COURTROOM WITH 12 JURORS WHO,
PRIOR TO TRIAL, YOU’VE NEVER MET.

SO, I CAN COMFORTABLY REPORT THAT
IF THESE 6 STEPS WORK FOR ME IN
COURT, THEY’LL ALSO WORK FOR YOU
DURING YOUR NEXT PRESENTATION.

MANY YEARS AGO I LEARNED 6 STEPS
TO SELECTING A JURY AND DEALING
WITH ELEPHANTS FROM LEGENDARY
TRIAL LAWYER, GERRY SPENCE.

YOU CAN USE THESE SAME 6 STEPS TO
MAKE A PRESENTATION OR CLOSE YOUR
NEXT DEAL.

BUT BEFORE WE GET STARTED, I WANT
YOU TO UNDERSTAND AND APPRECIATE
THIS IMPORTANT POINT…

YOU NEED TO BE IN THE MOMENT
WHEN GOING THROUGH THESE STEPS.

RATHER THAN WORRYING ABOUT WHAT
HAPPENS NEXT (MY VERDICT OR YOUR
CUSTOMER’S DECISION), EMBRACE THIS
PARTICULAR MOMENT IN AN HONEST
AND TRANSPARENT WAY.

GENUINELY LISTEN AND INTERACT WITH
THE OTHER PERSON OR AUDIENCE
DURING EACH OF THESE 6 STEPS. BE
REAL!

IT’S NOT ALWAYS EASY TO DISCUSS THE
ELEPHANT BUT IT IS ALWAYS
NECESSARY.

STEP #1: FIGURE OUT WHAT THE
CHALLENGING ISSUES ARE. WHAT
EXACTLY IS THE ELEPHANT IN THE
ROOM?

IN ONE OF MY CASES THE WHITE
ELEPHANT MIGHT BE THE ISSUE OF TORT
REFORM OR A JURY’S RELUCTANCE TO
AWARD LARGE MONEY DAMAGES.

IT COULD BE THE RACE OR SOCIAL
BACKGROUND OF MY CLIENT. EVERYBODY
IN THE COURTROOM KNOWS WHAT
EVERYONE ELSE IS THINKING BUT
NOBODY IS TALKING ABOUT IT.

IN THE COMPUTER SOFTWARE BUSINESS,
THE ELEPHANT MIGHT BE THE HIGH
INITIAL EXPENSE TO THE CUSTOMER OR
ADDITIONAL INFRASTRUCTURE
UPGRADES AND TRAINING.

UNDERSTAND THIS REALITY AND
FIGURE OUT WHAT THE ELEPHANT IS
AND YOU’RE ONE STEP AHEAD OF
EVERYONE ELSE.

STEP #2: GIVE THOUGHT AND
REFLECTION TO THE ELEPHANT.
FIGURE OUT HOW IT MAKES YOU
FEEL AND WHY.

IN MY TRIALS, I TRY AND FIGURE OUT
WHAT ISSUE(S) WILL BE CONTROVERSIAL
OR MAY HURT US AND I MAKE AN EFFORT
TO GRASP EXACTLY HOW THAT MAKES
ME FEEL.

BY GOING THROUGH THIS PROCESS
I’M ABLE TO SOMEWHAT APPRECIATE
HOW MY JURORS MIGHT FEEL ABOUT
THE ELEPHANT.

IN A SALES SITUATION, A HIGH
INITIAL PURCHASE PRICE MIGHT MAKE
A CUSTOMER THINK TWICE BEFORE
BUYING YOUR PRODUCT.

GIVE SOME THOUGHT AS TO WHY HE
MIGHT FEEL THAT WAY. IS IT TRULY A
MONEY THING OR IS IT REALLY A “DON’T
ROCK THE BOAT” WITH COMPANY POLICY
KIND OF THING?

DEEP INSIDE YOUR CORE, EXPLORE
AND INTERNALIZE THE ISSUES
BEHIND YOUR CUSTOMER’S HOW AND
WHY.

EXPLORE YOUR FEELINGS. OPEN YOUR
MIND AND HEART TO UNDERSTAND.

STEP #3: OPEN UP A BAG OF
PEANUTS AND COAX THE
ELEPHANT OUT INTO THE OPEN.

WHEN SELECTING MY JURY, I’M VERY OPEN
ABOUT HOW AND WHY I FEEL THE WAY I DO
ABOUT CERTAIN ISSUES. SOMETIMES I’M A
BIT EMBARRASSED FOR DOING SO BUT, BY
BEING TRANSPARENT, I’M BEING REAL.

BY BEING GENUINE I’M SHOWING MY
JURY THAT’S IT’S OK TO BE HONEST AND
OPEN AND TO SHARE OUR THOUGHTS,
CONCERNS AND EVEN FEARS WITH EACH
OTHER.

IT’S ABOUT LEADING BY EXAMPLE AND
STARTING A REAL AND HONEST
DIALOG. IT BEGINS THE TRUST
PROCESS.

I’M JUST HAVING AN HONEST DISCUSSION WITH
MY JURY. I WANT THEM TO EXPRESS THEIR
FEELINGS ON THE SUBJECT. I WANT TO TALK
ABOUT IT (WHICH IS MUCH DIFFERENT THAN
LECTURING SOMEONE ABOUT HOW THEY SHOULD
FEEL ABOUT SOMETHING).

YOU SHOULD USE THE SAME
APPROACH WITH YOUR CUSTOMER.

STEP #4: ASK THE OTHER PERSON
TO PULL OUT A PEANUT AND FEED
THE ELEPHANT.

I MIGHT ASK MY JURORS, “AM I THE
ONLY ONE WHO FEELS THIS WAY?” I
PUT MYSELF OUT THERE.

SOMETIMES IT TAKES A WHILE BUT
EVENTUALLY A JUROR WILL RAISE HER
HAND AND WE’LL START TALKING ABOUT
THE ISSUE OR WHAT WE’RE BOTH AFRAID
OF.

SHE MAY NOT USE THE WORDS, “I’M
AFRAID” BUT THE FACT IS, WE’RE
NOW FEEDING PEANUTS TO THE
ELEPHANT AND TALKING ABOUT IT.

THE PROCESS IS REAL, RAW AND
GENUINE. IT’S SOMETHING MANY
PEOPLE ARE NOT USE TO DOING.

IN SALES, YOU CAN DO THE SAME
THING. INVITE THE OTHER PERSON OR
AUDIENCE TO INTERACT WITH YOU
ABOUT THEIR FEELINGS.

“SPENDING THIS MUCH MONEY ON OUR
SOFTWARE HAS GOT TO BE A BIT NERVE
RACKING. INITIALLY, I’M NOT SURE I’D BE
COMFORTABLE DOING THIS. IS THIS HOW
YOU FEEL?”

ONCE YOU GET PEOPLE TO START
TALKING OPENLY AND HONESTLY,
MAGIC HAPPENS.

AFTER ALL, KNOWING EACH OTHERS
“TRUTH” IS KEY TO BUILDING
RESPECT, RAPPORT AND TRUST.

STEP #5: ACCEPT AND PLACE
VALUE ON WHAT THE OTHER
PERSON TELLS YOU ABOUT THE
ELEPHANT.

ONCE YOU OPEN YOURSELF UP TO THIS
KIND OF CONVERSATION, YOU ARE
GOING TO HEAR THINGS THAT WILL
BOTHER AND EVEN HURT YOUR
FEELINGS.

THE ELEPHANT IS GOING TO STEP ON
YOUR TOES. BUT THAT’S OK. THAT’S
THE POINT. KEEP MOVING FORWARD.

CONTINUE THE CONVERSATION AND
BE REAL. HELP EACH OTHER FEED
PEANUTS TO THE ELEPHANT.

IN SALES, YOU NEED TO KNOW WHAT’S
REALLY ON THE MIND OF YOUR PROSPECT
BEFORE HE LEAVES AND MAKES HIS
PURCHASE RECOMMENDATION.

TALKING ABOUT THE ELEPHANT IN THE
ROOM WILL HELP YOU MAXIMIZE YOUR
CHANCES OF TRULY UNDERSTANDING ALL
THE ISSUES AND ANSWERING ALL
QUESTIONS.

STEP #6: HOP ON THE BACK OF
THE ELEPHANT AND CONTINUE
SHARING YOUR THOUGHTS AND
FEELINGS.

NOW THAT YOU’VE GOT YOUR PROSPECT
TALKING AND BEING HONEST WITH YOU,
GO WITH THE FLOW. EMBRACE THE
CONVERSATION AND BE ENGAGED.

ASK OPEN-ENDED QUESTIONS AND
LISTEN MUCH MORE THAN YOU TALK. USE
YOUR BODY LANGUAGE TO TELL YOUR
PROSPECT THAT IT’S OK TO SAY AND
FEEL THE WAY THEY DO.

I’M NOT STANDING BEFORE MY
POTENTIAL JURORS TRYING TO HIDE
ANYTHING. IF I’M AFRAID OR CONCERNED
ABOUT SOMETHING, I WANT THEM TO
KNOW. IT’S A TRUST THING.

JURORS WILL TAKE CARE OF YOU AND YOUR
CLIENT IF THEY KNOW YOU ARE BEING
STRAIGHT WITH THEM AND EMPOWER THEM
TO HELP YOU. THEY’LL RESPECT YOU FOR
NOT BULLSHITTING THEM.

MOST PEOPLE WILL AVOID
EMBRACING THE ELEPHANT AND
FEEDING IT PEANUTS.

BUT NOW YOU KNOW THAT’S THEIR
PROBLEM AND NOT YOURS 

USING THESE 6 STEPS, YOU CAN DO
WHAT OTHERS ARE AFRAID TO DO
AND TAME THE ELEPHANT.

YOU CAN MAKE THE ELEPHANT IN THE
ROOM AN OPPORTUNITY TO LEARN
ABOUT THE OTHER PERSON AND
THEN, AND ONLY THEN…

HOP UP ON ITS BACK AND CLOSE THE
DEAL!

TRIAL LAWYER COMMUNICATION
TIPS FOR EVERYONE!
PLEASE SHARE MY PRESENTATION IF
YOU LIKED IT AND STOP BY MY BLOG
TO SAY HI. THANKS SO MUCH!
MITCHJACKSON.COM

How to Tame the Elephant in the Room- 6 steps to build trust and close deals!

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