Bishop Strachan School Cultural Competency and Microaggressions

Bishop Strachan School
Faculty and Staff
Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee
Seattle Girls’ School
Cultural Competency:
Stretching the Inclusive Boundaries
Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://tiny.cc/rosettalee)

About Seattle Girls’ School

Agenda
 Cultural Competency
 Experience Across Difference
 Zoom In: Microaggressions
 Navigating Ouch Moments

Getting the Most Out of Today
Apply Growth Mindset
Ask Questions
Participate Fully
Use Technology to Help You Engage
Visit Website After

Safety versus Comfort
Safety: I feel that, in this space, I can ask questions without
fear of judgment. I can voice my perspective and know that
I will be validated for the fact that that is my truth. Others
may challenge my ideas, but that challenge is in the spirit of
greater shared understanding and growth.
Comfort: I feel that, in this space, my reality will be agreed
with, validated, and unchallenged. I don’t have to explain
myself to be understood, and I don’t have to justify my
perspective, as everyone shares it.
True dialogue happens in an environment where everyone is
safe but not always comfortable...
SO THAT THEY CAN LEARN AND GROW.

Safe Spaces 2.0 – Brave Spaces
 Controversy with Civility
 Own your own intent and impact
 Challenge by choice – with reflection
 Respect in all its multiplicity
 No personal attacks, but pointed
challenges are okay
 Be mindful of the true source of your
emotions

Willingness to Self-Examine
William Taylor’s Reflective Competence Model

Culture [consists] primarily of the
symbolic, ideational, and intangible
aspects of human societies… It is the
values, symbols, interpretations, and
perspectives that distinguish one
people from another.
James A. Banks
What is Culture?

Dimensions of Identity and Culture
This model of identifiers and culture was created by Karen Bradberry and Johnnie Foreman for NAIS Summer Diversity Institute,
adapted from Loden and Rosener’s Workforce America! (1991) and from Diverse Teams at Work, Gardenswartz & Rowe (SHRM 2003).

Cultural Competency
Cultural competence is a set of
congruent behaviors, attitudes and
policies that come together in a
system, institution or individual and
enable that system, institution or
individual to work effectively in cross-
cultural situations.
Terry Cross

The Jones Model of Cultural Competence
Cultural Self-
Awareness
Cultural
Intelligence
Cross-Cultural
Effectiveness
Skills
Countering
Oppression
through
Inclusion

Cultural Competency: Key Elements
Value Orientation
Diversity as Value Added
Respect
Relationships
Equity
Thought Orientation
Knowledge
Awareness
Systems Thinking
Action Orientation
Consciousness Building
Capacity Building
Assessment
Adaptation

Process Break
Where do you feel your
school is currently in its
development toward cultural
competency? What makes
you think so? What are
some initial thoughts on what
areas the school can
improve?

Break

Experiences Across Difference
Internalized Oppression/Dominance
Stereotype Threat
Accumulated Impact/
Microaggressions
Code/Mode Switching
Fish Seeing the Water
“Normal” versus “Good”
“Intent” versus “Impact”

Reflection Conversations
How do experiences of
identity and difference
show up at BSS? In what
ways does the school
excel, and in what ways
can the school grow?

Lunch

Process
Process
Check

Caucus Groups
 Think about your various identities, and which
ones hold much importance to you.
 Which one of your identities do you feel most
moved to advocate for and educate around?
 You will be answering the following prompts:
– What we never want people to say, think, or
do towards our group is…
– What we want you to know about our group
is…
National Coalition Building Institute, Seattle Chapter, “Building Bridges Workshop,” Adapted by Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee

Caucus Groups Formation
 Groups Identified
 Locations Assigned
 Caucus Groups
Meeting Time
 Caucus Group
Report Outs

To Keep in Mind:
 Write down all answers to prompts.
 Think about which items you’d like to
share with the larger group.
 Everyone in the group is invited to stand
together.
 Decide who will share items and how.

Caucus Groups/Locales:
 Mother of Children
with Differences (2)
 Women in Male-
Dominated Positions (3)
 Being Childless (4)
 Adoptees (5)
 Feminist (6)
 Not Following
Traditional Age Timeline
(7)
 Being the Only
Member of Your Ethnic
Group (8)
 Being Black (9)
 Religious Minority (11)
 Being Religious (12)
 Working Parent (13)
 LGBTQAITS (14)
 Immigrant (16)
 Low Vision (19)
 Single Parent (20)
 Rural Upbringing (21)
 Boarding Student (22)
 Second + Generation
(23)
 Mental Illness (24)
 Female (25)
 Male (26)
 Ethnic Minority (27)
 Perceived Dominant
(30)
 Political Spectrum (29)
 Educational
Background (1)
 Artists/Creative Types
(18)
 Introverts (17)
 Stigmatized bject
Teachers (15)
 Geeks (10)
– What we
never want
people to
say, think, or
do towards
our group
is…
– What we
want you to
know about
our group
is…

Caucus Groups Work Time
Please document the responses to the following
prompts:
– What we never want people to say, think, or
do towards our group is…
– What we want you to know about our group
is…

Caucus Group Report Outs

Debrief: Caucus Groups
1. What information was new,
informative, moving, etc. to
you?
2. How does this information
change what you will think or
do in the future?
3. What action can you take to
become a better advocate for
yourself?
4. What action can you take to
become a better ally for
others?

Debunking Some Myths
 All or None
 Mistakes and Moral Worth
 Apologies
 “Tonsils” Theory
 Vulnerability

Speaking From the Heart

What We’re Thinking and Feeling
When Receiving the Ouch
Did that really
happen? Do they
realize? I want to
trust, but I’ve had
this happen so
many times before.
I am so stressed,
confused, hurt….

What We End Up Saying
When Receiving the Ouch
That was so
offensive!
I can’t believe
you did that!

Self Advocacy Through the Ouch Moment
 Affirm the person or relationship
 Describe the behavior without judgment
 Explain the emotion/impact and your filters
 Assume positive intent
 Request or suggest different behavior
*** Key Points: timing, I statements, actions not
adjectives, inside feelings not outside feelings***

Self Advocacy Through an Ouch Moment:
An Example
Is this an okay time to talk? I really appreciate
having you as a colleague. We’ve collaborated
well, and I respect the contributions you make to
the team. Earlier today, when we were in a
disagreement about the budget allocation, I heard
you say, “You’re being such an emotional
woman.” I was really hurt when I heard that. I am
passionate and express myself openly, and it
seems like so many people misinterpret that as
my being a too emotional and that it’s because I
am a woman. It’s frustrating and saddening that I
don’t get to express myself fully or authentically
without judgment. I imagine you didn’t mean for
me to feel that way. Can I ask that you please not
say things like that anymore?

Practice Round:
Self Advocacy Through the Ouch Moment
 Affirm the person or relationship
 Describe the behavior without judgment
 Explain the emotion/impact and your filters
 Assume positive intent
 Request or suggest different behavior
*** Key Points: timing, I statements, actions not
adjectives, inside feelings not outside feelings***

Being A Witness

What We’re Thinking and Feeling
When Witnessing the Ouch
I can’t believe this
is happening.
That’s SO not
right. Should I
say something?
Am I butting in?
Would it help?
I am so upset!

What We End Up Saying
When Witnessing the Ouch

What Others Hear When We Say Nothing
See? They
agree with me!
I am so right
about this.
No one sees or
understands. I
am alone.

NCBI Effective
Interventions Model
 Reduce Defensiveness
– Tone
– Body Language
– Respect
 Keep the Conversation Going
– Hear Them Out
– Ask Open-Ended Questions
– Set Aside Your Feeling for the Moment
– Dialogue
 Build the Relationship
 Stop the Behavior
 Win an Ally

Say Something to Somebody
 Now or Later (or Say It Now About a Later)
 Target, Agent, Fellow Bystanders, Authority Figures
“In the End, we will remember not the words of
our enemies, but the silence of our friends.”
Martin Luther King, Jr.

Intervening in the Ouch Moment: Examples
 Seek pleasure and delight in the other person
– “How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb?”
– “I’m SO glad you told me that joke. I’ve been trying to figure out why we think people
with yellow hair are stupid.”
 Find out the experience motivating the comment
– “Why can’t they just speak English around here?”
– “It must be hard not to understand what people are saying around you.”
– “I’m sick of my tuition paying for scholarship students.”
– “Tell me more about that.”
 Use exaggerated humor to highlight what’s going on
(use sparingly)
– “That movie is so gay.”
– “That movie is attracted to other movies? I didn’t know that was possible!”
 Join the person and do not make yourself superior
– “She got that award because she’s black and female.”
– “You know, I hear that a lot. I’ve been trying to figure out why we seem to think when a
black woman gets recognized it must be because of ‘diversity’ stuff rather than that she
earned it.”

Practice Round:
Intervening in the Ouch Moment
 Seek pleasure and delight in the other person
 Find out the experience motivating the comment
 Use exaggerated humor to highlight what’s going
on (use sparingly)
 Join the person and do not make yourself superior
***Ask open ended questions***

Listening to the Real Message

What Was Said During the Intervention
Those words or
actions are
hurtful to me.
Please stop.

What We Hear During the Intervention
You are a
bad, bad
person, and I
hate you!

What We Should Hear
During the Intervention
You are basically a good
and decent person. As
with all of us, you’ve
made a mistake in
behavior or words, and
you may not know the
impact they have on
others. I am going to
give you the gift of
information so that your
impacts can match your
intent.

When You’re Told About
the Ouch Moment You Created
 Listen with full attention
 Don’t try to defend or respond right away
– Take deep breaths
– Acknowledge your feelings
 Your mistakes don’t define you
– Be worthy of their trust and gift
 Prioritize the Impact over Intent
– Apologize for real
*** Moving through these moments with grace is
called shame resilience. It’s a vital skill***

the Ouch Moment You Created:
Examples
 “I really appreciate your telling me this.”
 “I’m so embarrassed that I did that.”
 “I’m so sorry my words and actions made you feel
that way. No matter what I intended, it hurt you.”
 “I’m pretty overwhelmed right now, and I don’t
want to respond in a way I’d regret. Do you think
you can help me come up with a better way to
handle that situation after I get into a calmer
place?”
 “I wanted to go back to a moment I don’t think I
handled very well… Can we talk?”

an Ouch Moment You Made
 Listen with full attention
 Don’t try to defend or respond right away
– Take deep breaths
– Acknowledge your feelings
 Your mistakes don’t define you
– Be worthy of their trust and gift
 Prioritize the Impact over Intent
– Apologize for real

Final Words of Advice:
Recognize Your Triggers

Find Your Bucket People

Practice Makes
Less Heart-Attack-Inducing

If You Messed Up and You Know It,
Don’t Wait for the Intervention –
Just Apologize

If You’re Really Sorry,
Work to Improve

Build Authentic Relationships

Developmental Model of Intercultural
Sensitivity (DMIS) Schematic

• Policy – Enumeration of the school’s diversity
commitment through mission, strategic plan,
handbooks, websites, etc.
• Programming – Diversity training and programming for
all constituencies (board, admin, faculty, staff,
students, families, etc.). Diversity and inclusivity
curriculum.
• Practice – Consistent and meaningful revisit of policy and
programs. Climate assessments, proactive changes,
and meaningful responses to incidents.
• People – Critical mass of people who are supportive AND
active on all levels.
• Pecuniary – Funding, people, and time allocated in the
strategic plan and daily life for supporting diversity
efforts.
Identifying Growth Zones – The 5Ps

Stretching the Inclusive Boundaries

Presenter Information
Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee
6th Faculty and
Professional Outreach
Seattle Girls’ School
2706 S Jackson Street
Seattle WA 98144
(206) 805-6562
rlee@seattlegirlsschool.org
http://tiny.cc/rosettalee

Identity Resources
• Carlos H. Arce, “A Reconsideration of Chicano Culture
and Identity”
• Atkinson, Morten, & Sue, “Racial/Cultural Identity
Development Model (R/CID)”
• Mindy Bingham and Sandy Stryker, “Socioemotional
Development for Girls”
• Vivienne Cass, “Homosexual identity formation: Testing
a theoretical model”
• William Cross, Shades of Black: Diversity in African
American Identity”
• Anthony D’Augelli, “ Identity development and sexual
orientation: Toward a model of lesbian, gay, and
bisexual development”

Identity Resources
• Erik Erikson, “Eight Stages of Man”
• J. E. Helms, Various Publications on Racial and Ethnic
Identity Development
• Jean Kim, “Processes of Asian American Identity
Development”
• James Maricia, “Four Ego and Identity Statuses”
• Suzanne Kobasa Ouellette, “The Three C’s of
Hardiness”
• Jean S. Phinney, “Ethnic Identity in Adolescents and
Adults: Review of the Research”
• Ponterotto & Pederso, Preventing Prejudice
• Maria P. P. Root, Various Works on Multiracial Identity

Identity Resources
• Patricia Romney, Karlene Ferron, and Jennifer Hill,
“Measuring the Success of Diversity Directors in
Independent Schools”
• Pedro Ruiz, “Latino/a Identity Development Model”
• Chalmer E. Thompson and Robert T. Carter, Racial
Identity Theory
• Alex Wilson, “How We Find Ourselves: Identity
Development and Two Spirit People”
• Christine J. Yeh, “The Collectivistic Nature of Identity
Development Among Asian-American College
Students”

Resources
 Joshua M. Aronson, Ph.D., “Improving Achievement &
Narrowing the Gap,” Learning and the Brain
Conference, Cambridge, MA, November 2003
 Allan G. Johnson, Privilege, Power, and Difference.
 Miss Representation, documentary film on media and
women
 United Nations Population Fund Statistics on Gender
Equality as of 2005
http://www.unfpa.org/swp/2005/presskit/factsheets/facts
_gender.htm
 Learning to be critically literate of mass media
http://www.medialit.org/
 Media Guide for Parents and Educators
http://www.commonsensemedia.org/

Gender Specific Resources
 Jennifer Bryan, various trainings and publications on gender
and sexuality diversity, From the Dress Up Corner to the
Senior Prom
 JoAnn Deak, Ph.D., Girls Will Be Girls: Raising Confident and
Courageous Daughters, How Girls Thrive
 Jackson Katz, Tough Guise, Wrestling with Manhood, The
Macho Paradox
 John Medina, Talaris Research Institute, various studies on
early gender differences in competition and play
 Mary Pipher, Ph.D., Reviving Ophelia: Saving the Selves of
Adolescent Girls
 Rachel Simmons, Odd Girl Out, Odd Girl Speaks Out, Curse
of the Good Girl
 Michael Thompson, Raising Cain, Speaking of Boys, It’s a
Boy!

Communication Resources
• “Stereotype Threat” by Joshua Aronson
• Brenda J. Allen, Difference Matters: Communicating
Social Identity
• William Gudykunst, Cross-Cultural and Intercultural
Comunication
• Milton Bennett, PhD, Intercultural Communication
Institute www.intercultural.org
• “Non-Verbal Communication Across Cultures” by Erica
Hagen, Intercultural Communication Resources
• Thiagi.com
• Thrive! Team Dynamics
• http://www.analytictech.com/mb021/action_science_
history.htm

Miscellaneous Resources
• Karen Bradberry and Johnnie Foreman, “Privilege and
Power,” Summer Diversity Institute, National Association
of Independent Schools, 2009
• Po Bronson and Ashley Merryman, Nurture Shock
• Kevin Jennings, GLSEN (Gay Lesbian and Straight Education
Network) www.glsen.org
• Allan G. Johnson, Privilege, Power, and Difference
• Johnnie McKinley, “Leveling the Playing Field and Raising
African American Students’ Achievement in Twenty-nine
Urban Classrooms,” New Horizons for Learning,
http://www.newhorizons.org/strategies/differentiated/
mckinley.htm
Michael J Nakkula and Eric Toshalis, Understanding Youth.

Bishop Strachan School Cultural Competency and Microaggressions

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