This document outlines an agenda and presentation for a "Train the Trainer" workshop about facilitating courageous conversations. The agenda includes discussions of courageous conversations, fears and obstacles to conversations, interruption and facilitation skills, and practices. It provides guidance on reducing defensiveness, keeping conversations going, building relationships, and winning allies. Examples and practices are provided to help participants learn skills for interrupting effectively and facilitating difficult discussions.
1. Train the Trainer:
Interrupting with Care and
Facilitating Courageous Conversations
The Foote School
Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee
Seattle Girls’ School
Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://tiny.cc/rosettalee)
5. Fears and Anxieties that Keep Us
from Having Conversations
Offending
Losing Face
Tokenism
Professional Risk
Bursting the Bubble
Rocking the Boat
Conflict
Lack of “Authority”
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6. Pitfalls and Obstacles that Keep Us
from Conversing Again
Outbursts
Silence
Denial
The Good Talk
Teacher vs. Facilitator
Personal Attacks
The Quick Fix
Leadership Oppression
Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://tiny.cc/rosettalee)
9. NCBI Effective Interventions Model
Reduce Defensiveness
– Tone
– Body Language
– Respect
Keep the Conversation Going
–
–
–
–
Hear Them Out
Ask Open-Ended Questions
Set Aside Your Feeling for the Moment
Dialogue
Build the Relationship
Win an Ally
Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://tiny.cc/rosettalee)
10. Everything You Ever Wanted to Interrupt
But Didn’t Know How To…
Think of trigger events of phrases
Which ones have proven most challenging?
Which ones would you like to strategize effective
interventions for?
Strategize for different people: strangers,
acquaintances, friends, family members,
children, etc.
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11. Practice Makes…
Please work in pairs:
-Feed the trigger phrase
-Respond
-Feedback
-Try Again
-Repeat
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14. Facilitation Skills
Space
Confidence and Competence
Relationship Building
Credibility
Flexibility and Authority
Optimism
Modeling
Multiple Learning Styles
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15. Facilitation Tips
Co-facilitation
Depersonalization
Vulnerability
Relationships
Saving it for Later
Discomfort
Clarification
Listening
Hot Buttons
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16. Avoiding the Pitfalls and
Overcoming the Obstacles
Powerful stories
Powerful statistics
Powerful analogies
Facilitation Skills
Welcoming environment
Clear and strict norms
Willingness to sit with
discomfort
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17. Equality versus Equity
Everybody gets a shirt versus everybody
gets a shirt that fits.
Giving everybody some insulin in
equality. Giving only people who are
diabetic some insulin is equity.
What is “fair”?
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19. Correlation versus Causation
Correlation: When income is averaged and compared, there
is a strong correlation between gender and income. This is
due to a myriad of historical, systemic, and economic factors that
impact men and women differently in the workplace.
Causation: When income is averaged and compared, there is a
strong correlation between gender and income. This must be
because women must not be as smart, hard-working, or
good with money as men.
Correlation: When more firefighters are fighting a fire, the
bigger the fire is observed to be.
Causation: The additional firefighters made the fire bigger.
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21. Privilege
“Privilege exists when one group has
something of value that is denied to others
simply because of the groups they belong
to, rather than because of anything they’ve
done or failed to do.”
[as described by Peggy McIntosh and quoted by Allan Johnson]
Privilege is SYSTEMIC. It drives the
systems that dominate our societies.
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22. Situational Advantage
There are prime parking spots and seats
reserved for people with disabilities. People
with disabilities are often first to board
planes and other transportation vehicles.
These advantages are situational and do not
balance out systemic oppression.
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23. Safety versus Comfort
Safety: I feel that, in this space, I can ask questions without
fear of judgment. I can voice my perspective and know that
I will be validated for the fact that that is my truth. Others
may challenge my ideas, but that challenge is in the spirit of
greater shared understanding and growth.
Comfort: I feel that, in this space, my reality will be agreed
with, validated, and unchallenged. I don’t have to explain
myself to be understood, and I don’t have to justify my
perspective, as everyone shares it.
As educators, we are constantly setting up an environment
where students are safe but not always comfortable...
SO THAT THEY CAN LEARN AND GROW.
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26. Goals to Strive For
Be Real
Don’t End Early
Don’t “Admire the Problem”
Sit With All the Feelings
Support the Facilitator
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27. Round One Discussion Time
Discussion: Many schools struggle to have
many students and faculty members of
color because there “aren’t enough strong
candidates of color.” What do you think?
Round One
Discussion
Round One
Feedback and
Discussion
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28. Round Two Discussion Time
Discussion: Should schools revamp the
curriculum to include multiple diversity
perspectives even if there is little to no
diversity of that sort in the student or
faculty/staff population?
Round Two
Discussion
Round Two
Feedback and
Discussion
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29. Round Three Discussion Time
Discussion: What is the role of men and
women in the work toward gender equity
and social justice?
Round Two
Discussion
Round Two
Feedback and
Discussion
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30. Large Group Share
What were some:
Ah-ha moments
Great strategies
Heads up
Questions or Concerns
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31. Next Steps
Attend more Train the Trainer workshops
Have more real discussions with people
who affirm you
Have more real one-on-one dialogue with
people who may or may not affirm you
Continue to learn and grow in your
knowledge base for content AND skills
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32. Final Questions or Comments?
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33. Resources
• Anti-Defamation League
• Cross Cultural Connections
(www.CulturesConnecting.com)
• Facilitation First
• Jimpact Enterprises, Inc.
• National Coalition Building Institute
• The People’s Institute
• Stirfry Seminars
• The Thiagi Group
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34. Presenter Information
Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee
6th Faculty and
Professional Outreach
Seattle Girls’ School
2706 S Jackson Street
Seattle WA 98144
(206) 805-6562
rlee@seattlegirlsschool.org
http://tiny.cc/rosettalee
Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://tiny.cc/rosettalee)