This is the keynote address I gave at a ‘women in tech’ event for Deloitte (London, 2014). I’m sharing it here because more often than not, when I’m invited to speak I’m the only female voice on the lineup. I absolutely love giving presentations, but it saddens me that we are so under-represented in the public domain, especially since at many of these events I am approached afterwards by women asking how they can contribute to the conversation and take the stage. My hope is that in sharing this address and the slides from my presentation, it will encourage and inspire other women in STEM to follow their passions and take the lead; so that together, we can help shape a more representative, exciting and diverse vision of the future of tech.

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WHY AREN’T WOMEN
TAKING THE STAGE IN TECH?

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GRAB THE SLIDES
bit.ly/woman_you_got_this

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1 An introduction
2 Things that hold us back
3 Things I wish I’d known
4 Things I’ve learned
5 Resources
TODAY’S TALK

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INTRODUCTION

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THE WEB PSYCHOLOGIST LTD.
NATHALIE NAHAÏ
@NathalieNahai
TheWebPsychologist.com
InstituteOfWebPsychology.com

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MY STORY

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MY STORY
• I’d always felt ambitious and an ‘outsider’

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MY STORY
• I’d always felt ambitious and an ‘outsider’
• Convoluted path, tried lots of different things

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MY STORY
• I’d always felt ambitious and an ‘outsider’
• Convoluted path, tried lots of different things
• I didn’t see a job that existed that I wanted,
so I made up my own

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WEB PSYCHOLOGY
In 2011, I coined the term
‘Web Psychology’ and in 2012
I published my first book…

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WEBS OF INFLUENCE
THE PSYCHOLOGY OF ONLINE PERSUASION
Pearson, 2012
UK | EU | USA | KOREA | JAPAN | CHINA

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HMMM…
“ ”
Where are all the women?

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A GLOBAL PICTURE
• 195 countries, only 22% are led by women1

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A GLOBAL PICTURE
• 195 countries, only 22% are led by women1
• 22% of seats in UK parliament are held by women2

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A GLOBAL PICTURE
• 195 countries, only 22% are led by women1
• 22% of seats in UK parliament are held by women2
• 4.8% of Fortune 500 CEOs are women3

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A GLOBAL PICTURE
• 195 countries, only 22% are led by women1
• 22% of seats in UK parliament are held by women2
• 4.8% of Fortune 500 CEOs are women3
• Only 3 of Google's 36 top employees are women4

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QUESTION
“ ”
Would you describe yourself
as ambitious?

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DISPARITY
• Millennial women are less likely than their male
peers to describe themselves as ‘leaders’,
‘visionaries’, ‘self-confident’ and ‘willing to take risks’5

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DISPARITY
• Millennial women are less likely than their male
peers to describe themselves as ‘leaders’,
‘visionaries’, ‘self-confident’ and ‘willing to take risks’5
• When girls are reminded of their gender by
checking M or F on a test, they perform worse6

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DISPARITY
• Millennial women are less likely than their male
peers to describe themselves as ‘leaders’,
‘visionaries’, ‘self-confident’ and ‘willing to take risks’5
• When girls are reminded of their gender by
checking M or F on a test, they perform worse6
• Stereotype threats undermine womens’ and girls’
performance and interest in STEM fields7

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MY DAD ALWAYS TOLD ME
“ ”
You’re smart, you can figure this out

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F**K IT
WHY NOT?

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YOUR CAREER
Skills
Values
Desired lifestyle
CAREER CHOICE
+

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“ ”
You have to trust that the dots
will somehow connect in your future.
You have to trust in something – your gut,
destiny, life, karma, whatever. This approach
has never let me down, and it has made
all the difference in my life.8
STEVE JOBS

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EXERCISE

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EXERCISE: VALUES
1 Which parts of your personality do you like most?

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EXERCISE: VALUES
1 Which parts of your personality do you like most?
2 What skills, abilities or knowledge can you share?

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EXERCISE: VALUES
1 Which parts of your personality do you like most?
2 What skills, abilities or knowledge can you share?
3 Do you have confidence in your own opinions?

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EXERCISE: VALUES
1 Which parts of your personality do you like most?
2 What skills, abilities or knowledge can you share?
3 Do you have confidence in your own opinions?
4 Do you feel you are in charge of your situation?

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EXERCISE: VALUES
1 Which parts of your personality do you like most?
2 What skills, abilities or knowledge can you share?
3 Do you have confidence in your own opinions?
4 Do you feel you are in charge of your situation?
5 Do you feel you have purpose in your life?

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EXERCISE: VALUES
1 Which parts of your personality do you like most?
2 What skills, abilities or knowledge can you share?
3 Do you have confidence in your own opinions?
4 Do you feel you are in charge of your situation?
5 Do you feel you have purpose in your life?
6 Do you seek out new, exciting experiences?

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VALUES & WELLBEING9
1 Self-acceptance

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VALUES & WELLBEING9
1 Self-acceptance
2 Autonomy

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VALUES & WELLBEING9
1 Self-acceptance
2 Autonomy
3 Positive relations with others

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VALUES & WELLBEING9
1 Self-acceptance
2 Autonomy
3 Positive relations with others
4 Purpose in life

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VALUES & WELLBEING9
1 Self-acceptance
2 Autonomy
3 Positive relations with others
4 Purpose in life
5 Environmental mastery

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VALUES & WELLBEING9
1 Self-acceptance
2 Autonomy
3 Positive relations with others
4 Purpose in life
5 Environmental mastery
6 Personal growth

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THINGS THAT
HOLD US BACK

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THINGS THAT HOLD US BACK
The idea that you have to make the
‘right choice’. Don’t bother - you’ll never
have enough data.
1

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THINGS THAT HOLD US BACK
The idea that you have to make the
‘right choice’. Don’t bother - you’ll never
have enough data.
Make your best choice based on the
info you do have.
1

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THINGS THAT HOLD US BACK
Women wait until they meet 100% of the
criteria of a job role before applying10.
2

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THINGS THAT HOLD US BACK
Women wait until they meet 100% of the
criteria of a job role before applying10.
It’s about process, not confidence11.
Get used to launching at 60%, you can
figure out the rest as you go along.
2

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THINGS THAT HOLD US BACK
When a professional endeavor goes
wrong, we tend to blame ourselves. When
it goes right, we credit circumstance /
other people for our success12.3

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THINGS THAT HOLD US BACK
When a professional endeavor goes
wrong, we tend to blame ourselves. When
it goes right, we credit circumstance /
other people for our success12.
Stop it.
3

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THINGS THAT HOLD US BACK
Women are a quarter as likely as men to
negotiate a raise. We tend to doubt our
opinions and are more prone to
“rumination” than men12.4

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THINGS THAT HOLD US BACK
Women are a quarter as likely as men to
negotiate a raise. We tend to doubt our
opinions and are more prone to
“rumination” than men12.
Adopt a different strategy (see resources)
4

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THINGS THAT HOLD US BACK
Fear of being too smart, too vocal, too
successful.
5

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THINGS THAT HOLD US BACK
Fear of being too smart, too vocal, too
successful.
You live once. Make it count.5

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EXERCISE

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EXERCISE
1 What would you do if you knew couldn’t fail?

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EXERCISE
1 What would you do if you knew couldn’t fail?
2 What are you good at?

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EXERCISE
1 What would you do if you knew couldn’t fail?
2 What are you good at?
3 What would you do in life if you didn’t need to
work for money?

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EXERCISE
1 What would you do if you knew couldn’t fail?
2 What are you good at?
3 What would you do in life if you didn’t need to
work for money?
4 How important is social approval for you?

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EXERCISE
1 What would you do if you knew couldn’t fail?
2 What are you good at?
3 What would you do in life if you didn’t need to
work for money?
4 How important is social approval for you?
5 Who is your biggest inspiration and why?

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EXERCISE
6 What do you want from your career?

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EXERCISE
6 What do you want from your career?
7 Who do you want to be?

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EXERCISE
6 What do you want from your career?
7 Who do you want to be?
8 What does success mean to you?

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EXERCISE
6 What do you want from your career?
7 Who do you want to be?
8 What does success mean to you?
9 What values do you admire most in others?

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EXERCISE
6 What do you want from your career?
7 Who do you want to be?
8 What does success mean to you?
9 What values do you admire most in others?
10 What does your perfect day look like?

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THINGS I WISH
I HAD KNOWN

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THINGS I WISH I’D KNOWN
The career you choose now probably
won’t be the career you end up in.
1

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THINGS I WISH I’D KNOWN
2
Ready, fire, aim.
You can build the plane as you’re
flying it.

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THINGS I WISH I’D KNOWN
3
No one knows what they’re doing.
We’re making this shit up as we go along.
It’s called innovation.

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THINGS I WISH I’D KNOWN
“Women are catty.”
It’s a load of bollocks.
Let’s help each other out.4

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THINGS I WISH I’D KNOWN
5
Most of the things you think are holding
you back are in your own head.

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THINGS I’VE
LEARNED

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THINGS I’VE LEARNED
1
Surround yourself with people who are
smarter than you.
They’ll challenge you and make you raise
your game.

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THINGS I’VE LEARNED
2
People are generous.
Ask for help when you need it.

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THINGS I’VE LEARNED
It’s healthy to question yourself.
People who doubt their competence
are typically more competent than those
who don’t13.
3

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THINGS I’VE LEARNED
Imposter syndrome – if you feel a bit
like a fraud, chances are you’re doing
something right14.
4

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THINGS I’VE LEARNED
5
Know what matters to you.
Decide on a general direction and start.
Keep your mind open for anything that
excites you, challenges you, inspires you.

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RESOURCES

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BOOKS & LINKS
• BOOK The End of Men – Hanna Rosin
• BOOK Vagina: A New Biography – Naomi Wolf
• LINK How to negotiate effectively: getraised.com

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WEBSITES & COMMUNITIES
• womenintechnology.org
• adaslist.co
• ladygeek.com
• littlemissgeek.org
• witi.com

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REFERENCES
1 Female world leaders currently in power (17th September 2014) http://www.jjmccullough.com/charts_rest_female-leaders.php
2 Women in national parliaments (1st October 2014) http://www.ipu.org/wmn-e/classif.htm
3 Fairchild, C. (3rd June 2014) Number of Fortune 500 women CEOs reaches historic high. Fortune.
http://fortune.com/2014/06/03/number-of-fortune-500-women-ceos-reaches-historic-high/
4 Kurtzleben, D. (29th May 2014). Only 3 of Google's 36 top employees are women. Vox.
http://www.vox.com/2014/5/29/5761250/only-3-of-googles-36-top-employees-are-women
5 Goux, D. (2012) Millennials in the Workpalce, Bentley University Center for Women and Business, 17-25.
https://www.bentley.edu/centers/sites/www.bentley.edu.centers/files/centers/cwb/millennials-report.pdf
6 Danaher, K. and Crandall, C. S. (2008), Stereotype Threat in Applied Settings Re-Examined. Journal of Applied Social Psychology, 38: 1639–1655.
7 Shapiro, J. R. and Williams, A. M. (2011) The Role of Stereotype Threats in Undermining Girls’ and Women’s Performance and Interest in STEM Fields.
Sex Roles, 66, nos. 3-4, 175-83.
8 Steve Jobs (14th June 2005) ‘You've got to find what you love,' Jobs says. Stanford News.
http://news.stanford.edu/news/2005/june15/jobs-061505.html
9 Ryff, C. (1989). Happiness is everything, or is it? Explorations on the meaning of psychological well-being. Journal of Personality and Social
Psychology, 57:1069–1081.
10 Desvaux, G, Deillard-Hoellinger, S. and Meaney, M. C. (2008) A business Case for Women. The McKinsey Quarterly, September, 4.
http://www.forbes.com/2008/10/03/business-women-economics-lead-cx_1003mckinsey.html
11 Mohr, T. S. (25th August 2014) Why Women Don’t Apply for Jobs Unless They’re 100% Qualified. Harvard Business Review.
http://blogs.hbr.org/2014/08/why-women-dont-apply-for-jobs-unless-theyre-100-qualified/
12 Jessica Bennett, J. (22nd April 2014) It’s Not You, It’s Science: How Perfectionism Holds Women Back. Time.
http://time.com/70558/its-not-you-its-science-how-perfectionism-holds-women-back/
13 Kruger, J. and Dunning, D. (1999) Unskilled and Unaware of It: How Difficulties in Recognizing One's Own Incompetence Lead to Inflated Self-Assessments. Journal of
Personality and Social Psychology 77 (6): 1121–34.
14 Clance, P. R. and Imes, S. A. (1978). The impostor phenomenon in high achieving women: Dynamics and therapeutic intervention. Psychotherapy: Theory, Research,
and Practice 15 (3): 241–247.

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WOMAN
.YOU GOT THIS

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GO BUILD IT
THE FUTURE IS YOURS

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THE WEB PSYCHOLOGIST LTD.
NATHALIE NAHAÏ
@NathalieNahai
TheWebPsychologist.com
InstituteOfWebPsychology.com