family communication patterns

1. Communication
Patterns: Rules,
networks, secrets,
and narratives
HMNS 10111

2. Relational Culture:
 Based on a jointly constructed world view
 Private world of rules, understandings,
meanings and patterns of acting and
interpreting that partners create for their
relationship.
 These are the underpinnings of a family’s
communication patterns and are created
out of communication (Galvin et al., 2008)
 Symbolic blue prints that impact meaning

3. Communication Patterns:
Definition
 Complex set of
“moves” which have
been established
through repetition
and have become
so automatic as to
continue without
conscious awareness
Dimensions of…
 communication
rules
 secrets
 communication
networks
 narratives

4. Communication Rules:
 Relationship agreements that prescribe
and limit a family’s behavior over time
(Galvin et al., 2008)
 Reflect patterns of “oughts” or “shoulds”
1. Constitutive rules: define what counts in
communication
2. Relational rules: refer to unique rules that
are developed and repeated through
interaction over time and become
reflected in behaviour.

5. Qualities of Communication Rules:
 Some are negotiated directly, others
indirectly
 Have great staying power for long periods of
time – generations in some cases
 Once established changing them can be
complicated
 They are maintained and changed through
positive (growth) or negative (maintenance)
feedback
 Some family rules reflect societal shifts
 Conflict can emerge from breaking rules that
some members may not even know exist

6. Framework for Looking at Types of
Communication Rules:
 What can be talked about?
 How can it be talked about?
 With whom can it be talked about?
 To whom can it be talked about?
 What are the conditions?

7. Family Secrets:
 Info that is purposely hidden or
concealed by one or more family
members
 Example: Don’t talk..as a way to maintain
denial of a problem
 Secrets create or reinforce boundaries
 Managing secrets depends on the
members ability to define who “owns”
what information

8. Types of Family Secrets
 Sweet – created for the purpose of fun
 Essential – promote necessary
boundaries that define relationship
 Toxic – poison family relationships and
maintaining them can have chronic
negative effects on problem solving
 Dangerous – put people in immediate
or physical jeopardy or emotional
turmoil to an extent that their capacity
to function is threatened

9. Functions of Secrets:
 Bonding - cohesiveness
 Evaluation – avoidance of negative judgment
 Maintenance –keep status quo
 Privacy – not anyone’s business
 Defense - protection
 Communication – lack of openness
 Secrets have powerful effects, tied to
communication networks

10. Family Communication Networks:
 Patterned channels by which families
transmit information. Information may
flow between those with equal power
(horizontal) or those with unequal power
(vertical)
 Types
 Chain Network
 “Y” Network
 Wheel Network
 All Channel Network

11. Functions of Communication
Networks:
• Manage cohesion (emotional bonding)
• Deal with relational tasks such as:
– Conveying instructions
– Maintaining secrets
– Organizing activities
– Regulating time
• Maintain roles and rules operating within the
family system
• High family adaptability = a wide variety of
network arrangements

12. Narratives/stories
• Play key role in development of meaning
• They serve key functions:
– Remembering
– Creating belonging & family identity
– Teaching expected behaviour & deeply
held values to current members as well as
socializing new members
– Development of family culture
– Provide stability by connecting generations
– Entertaining

13. Questions Stories Answer
 How did this family come to be?
 Are parents really human?
 How does a child become an adult in this
family?
 Will the family stand behind its members?
 How does the family handle adversity?

14. Reference
Galvin, K., Bylund, C., & Brommel, B. (2008).
Family Communication: Cohesion &
Change, 7th edition. Boston: Pearson
Education, Inc. Chapter 4