1. Pastoral Care for Self-Esteem Tiffany Buchanan Soul Physicians

2. YouTube - Can We Talk About Self Esteem? Can We Talk About Self Esteem?

3. “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.” ~Eleanor Roosevelt “Someone’s opinion of you does not have to become your reality.” ~Les Brown “I was always looking outside myself for strength and confidence but it comes from within. It is there all the time.” ~Anna Freud “It’s not who you are that holds you back, it’s who you think you’re not.” ~Author Unknown “What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.” ~Ralph Waldo Emerson “If you must love your neighbor as yourself, it is at least as fair to love yourself as your neighbor.” ~Nicholas de Chamfort “The way you treat yourself sets the standard for others.” ~Sonya Friedman Historical Thoughts on Self Esteem

5. Number of children in the world 2.2 billion

7. Asian American 10.6%

8. European American 10.5%

9. Latino American 21.2%

10. Native American 25.3%

11. Native Hawaiian 15.9%

12. Other races 22.0%Why Self Esteem?

13. Wimberly explains that “relational refugees” are those of us who for one reason or another have found ourselves outside of nurturing and/or liberatory community relationships, this extends far beyond merely economics. These loving and empowering relationships shape and direct our social identity and a healthy sense of self. “Human beings need to be surrounded by people who have positive attitudes toward them, because such attitudes become the basis for one’s own positive self-image. People become selves by internalizing the attitudes of others” (Wimberly, p. 23). Pastoral care, according to Wimberly, connects to all of this analysis because he views pastoral counseling as the primary step to reincorporate relational refugees back into a nurturing community. Theoretical Assumptions

14. What is Self Esteem? To begin: self concept: is a set of personal beliefs a person has about who they are as an individual. This includes: salient personal characteristics as well as ethnic or professional awareness and any other desires or future goals that resonate strongly with the individual. Next: self esteem: a realistic respect for or favorable impression of oneself; self-respect. In order to have a healthy and balanced self concept, one needs to have a positive self esteem. Thus, one reinforces the other reflexively.

15. Adolescence Defined Adolescence is a very demanding and difficult time of accelerated development physically, socially, cognitively, emotionally, and sexually. Not only is it a time of great development, but it is also the time when one begins to form his or her own identity. Adolescence

16. Saplings in a Hurricane Adolescent girls are saplings in a hurricane. They are young and vulnerable trees that the winds blow with immense strength. Developmentally, everything is changing! Distance between parents increases while distance between peers decreases Many mixed messages are presented to girls in this time of identity formation. Be sexy but not sexual. Be independent but nice. Be smart but not so smart that you threaten boys. False self-training Girls are being trained to be what the culture wants them to be and not necessarily what they want to be

17. According to Self Esteem International (2010), research indicates that youth self-esteem is directly correlated with: High or low academic achievement Alcohol and drug abuse Crime and violence Depression and suicide Eating Disorders Toxic interpersonal relationships Teenage pregnancy Research on Self-Esteem :

19. Care for the Hurting Pastoral Care is about leading others to freedom in Christ. Luke 4:18 (NIV) 18"The Spirit of the Lord is on me, because he has anointed me to preach good news to the poor. He has sent me to proclaim freedom for the prisoners and recovery of sight for the blind, to release the oppressed, 19to proclaim the year of the Lord's favor!" John 8:35-37 (NIV) 35Now a slave has no permanent place in the family, but a son belongs to it forever. 36So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed. 37I know you are Abraham's descendants. Hebrews 9:15 (NIV) 15For this reason Christ is the mediator of a new covenant, that those who are called may receive the promised eternal inheritance—now that he has died as a ransom to set them free from the sins committed under the first covenant. Galatians 5:1 (NIV) 1It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery. 2 Corinthians 3:16-18 (NIV) 16But whenever anyone turns to the Lord, the veil is taken away. 17Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom. 18And we, who with unveiled faces all reflect the Lord's glory, are being transformed into his likeness with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit.

20. Revelation Knowledge In the beginning, God created us in His image. Genesis 1:26-27 (NIV) 26 Then God said, "Let us make man in our image, in our likeness, and let them rule over the fish of the sea and the birds of the air, over the livestock, over all the earth, and over all the creatures that move along the ground." 27 So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them. Freedom is realized when we know we are loved and; uniquely beautiful made in the image of our beloved Father. We are part of the royal Family of God (Wimberly, 2000). Building Self Esteem

21. Who Am I? I AM loved. I AM free. I AM royal. I AM healed. I AM triumphant. I AM divine in nature. I AM abundantly blessed for the upliftment of others.

22. “I can’t.” (Philippians 4:13; Proverbs 23:7) “My life isn’t significant.” (Psalm 8:5-8; Ephesians 2:10; Romans 12:4-5; Psalm 139:14) “I don’t feel loved.” (1 John 4:8; John 16:27 amp; Romans 8:37; Colossians 3:12) “I’m inferior.” (Ephesians 2:6; Mark 1:11; Deuteronomy 28:13; John 4:4; 1 Co 2:16; Co 4:6; Romans 5:17) “I’m not worthy.” (Deuteronomy 32:9-11; Proverbs 3:14, 22:1; Luke 12:7; 1 Peter 1:7, 3:4) Conquering Our Thought Life

23. Life Skills To Teach Adolescents Centering Focusing on their thoughts or feeling and learning from their own internal reactions to their lives Example Handout for Centering Exercise Ability to separate thinking from feeling This is important and difficult as feelings are so intense for adolescents. Making conscious choices Encourage them to make slow and careful decisions on their own Making and holding boundaries This means that girls decide how to set limits about their time, activities, and their friends; learning how to say “no”

24. Defining relationships, not letting relationships define them Difficult because girls are socialized to let others do the defining Important because it allows them to be their true selves instead of who the world wants them to be Managing pain and their emotional reactions Teach them to acknowledge their pain and teach them positive ways to cope with it For example, journaling The joys of altruism instead of self-focus Encourage them to find ways to help others on a daily basis to help them become less self-focused Life Skills To Teach Adolescents (cont.)

25. According to Switzer (2000): Loyalty Tolerance Cooperation Complementarity Core of Healthy Relationships

26. The 5 W’s of Prayer Who should pray? Anyone! What should we pray for? Anything! When should we pray? Anytime! Where should we pray? Anywhere! Why should we pray? Because God answers prayer! (James 5:16) Prayer http://www.sermons4kids.com/5Ws_of_prayer.htm

27. Prayer Hand Thumb: Pray for the people closes to you Pointer finger: Pray for the people who point you to Jesus Middle finger: Pray for those people who are in authority Ring finger: Pray for those who are sick and who do not know Jesus Pinky finger: Pray for yourself

28. When we extend our love to God, He pours back into us unconditional love. Praise is an ATTITUDE of GRATITUDE Love God, Love God in U then Love others with that grateful love. Matthew 22:35-45 (NIV) 35One of them, an expert in the law, tested him with this question: 36"Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?" 37Jesus replied: " 'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.‘ 38This is the first and greatest commandment. 39And the second is like it: 'Love your neighbor AS yourself.' 40All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments." Praise is Loving God

29. YouTube - Who Am I - Casting Crowns Who R U?